just another player
nothing to see here
thought he was interesting
maybe he was different
but hes just another tool
just the same as all the rest
what a let down
why am i surprised
just another player
another coward that spreads his focus
a boy, not a man
just another child with a wandering eye
no worse, worse than a man, worse than a child,
he is nothing
nothing at all
a void
a hungry void of nothing
less than real, even less than fake
how could i not see that
i want to be defined by one
his and his alone
we touch, we love, we laugh, we exist
we set the boundaries of the real
he is mine and mine alone just mine MINE
i am love i am brilliant i want to be the sole focus
not shared like a toy
not blurred, not a smear
I am too ######6 unique to be shared
too important to be scattered
not passed by like im nothing
im better than that
i hate myself
loathe everything about me right now
but im still better than that
i may be shattered, broken dysfunction
yet i am change i will make it
i melt the shards and recombine
I have blood
i have a heart made of flesh
it hurts
but it beats
it pounds
f*ck you
im no fool for you
its not for you

cloaked in doubt but nose still high
she retreats
back inside
she goes quiet
she shields her presence from him
she re entombs her fire in ice
no one deserves her
she is gone
it's not time yet
the failure is a signal that it's not time
he watches from afar,

i pray that she find her fool soon
the one that can never abandon her
the one that will always be there for her
he may be ugly, he may be foul, he maybe the devil, the void
but that ugly ######6 frog
is the prince that will make her whole
because it's you
and then
maybe then
just maybe if
it seems so far
i know she'll make it but
what about me
will I make it
do i have what it takes to be the fool
i try but fail and fail again
how can i do this
break these patterns
i must break these patterns
i can change, i will be new
i am i will i must
its a race against time
I need to complete me
change, demand it be it
live up to my words
oh im such a pathetic weakling
but in choice i find strength
i must make it i will i will
even if i go mad
even if i die
i choose