var title = 'Psychology and Mental Health Forum Psychology Feed';
		var url = 'https://www.psychforums.com/blog/Psychology/random_blogs_c-3.html';
		var site_url = 'https://www.psychforums.com';
		var site_desc = 'Psychology and Mental Health Forum';
		var time = 'Thu, 07 Aug 2025 17:08:22 -0400';

		var data = new Array();
		

		data[0] = new Array();
		data[0]['title'] = 'Please help. I feel like such a freak and I hate myself so much.';
		data[0]['url'] = 'https://www.psychforums.com/blog/Psychology/please_help._i_feel_like_such_a_freak_and_i_hate_myself_so_much._c-3_u-83711_b-2348.html';
		data[0]['url'] = 'https://www.psychforums.com/blog/Psychology/please_help._i_feel_like_such_a_freak_and_i_hate_myself_so_much._c-3_u-83711_b-2348.html';
		data[0]['username'] = 'Vexed111';
		data[0]['blog_id'] = '2348';
		data[0]['blog_message'] = 'I am a sixteen year old female who is sexually attracted to her own mother. I&#039;m incredibly ashamed of it and I have no idea why I feel this way. I don&#039;t find her attractive. And I&#039;ve actually had an absolutely horrible relationship with her ever since i was 13 and I cannot stand the woman. <br />Honestly, the relationship is so horrible. I have trouble hearing her voice without getting incredibly pissed off. But recently I&#039;ve been getting so angry, that I actually become turned on. Now, the littlest things she does that used to make me so angry, now turn me on. For example, the way she handles everything so delicately, how soft her voice is...ect. ect. <br /><br />I&#039;ve been feeling this way for about 6 months and its been progressively getting worse. Now I find it invading my thoughts, and being on my mind frequently.<br />I have struggled with OCD in the past... Obsessive thoughts about things such as incest and bestiality .. but I&#039;ve never had problems with obsessive thinking AND erotic feelings.<br /><br />Please. help. I&#039;ve attempted suicide because of this, and I haven&#039;t been able to bring myself to tell my therapist or psychiatrist.<br />I have looked on some forums saying that feeling sexually attracted to a family member is more common than people realize... which makes me feel a little bit better.<br /><br />But I would like to know why on earth do I feel this way? And how can I make it go away?';
		data[0]['blog_time'] = 'Fri, 16 Mar 2012 17:30:38 -0400';
		

		data[1] = new Array();
		data[1]['title'] = 'I don't know what to do anymore.';
		data[1]['url'] = 'https://www.psychforums.com/blog/Psychology/i_don%CA%B9t_know_what_to_do_anymore._c-3_u-248158_b-5767.html';
		data[1]['url'] = 'https://www.psychforums.com/blog/Psychology/i_don%CA%B9t_know_what_to_do_anymore._c-3_u-248158_b-5767.html';
		data[1]['username'] = 'plsdontjudgeme';
		data[1]['blog_id'] = '5767';
		data[1]['blog_message'] = 'So for my first post, Im just going to do this as a journal I guess. I don&#039;t know.<br /><br />So basically, Im a teen. Please don&#039;t even ATTEMPT to judge me because I&#039;ve been through so much already and I am going to lose it.<br /><br />I feel so sad, hopeless, and SO angry all the time and I don&#039;t get why certain things happen to me. I mean, I was never a bad person. I don&#039;t know why I deserve all this at such a young age and I&#039;m so depressed and It&#039;s so UNFAIR.<br /><br />I hate me, I hate everyone, I hate the world. I hate everything. I never wanted to feel this way. I never EVER did. And now I do, and everything freaking sucks.<br /><br />My family thinks I&#039;m emo and my friends think I&#039;m outgoing and happy and I&#039;m going to lose it. I can&#039;t be who I really am because I&#039;m so afraid of being judged and I hate it so much.<br /><br />I spend most of the time in the bathroom breaking down to the point where I have to cover my mouth to make myself quiet. <br /><br />I&#039;m a TEEN.<br /><br />I never wanted to be like this AT ALL. I wanted to worry about my looks, my studies, and pop stars such as One Direction or Justin Bieber or something but NO. Life will not permit it and IT&#039;S UNFAIR.<br /><br />I want to be normal and so many bad experiences happened to me at such a young age and I&#039;m trying my best to BE happy but I can&#039;t and I don&#039;t know why.<br /><br />Instead of being HAPPY I&#039;m depressed, hopeless, angry and I HATE IT SO MUCH.<br /><br />I don&#039;t know what to do. I don&#039;t see any future of mine. I want to die but I don&#039;t and I really don&#039;t know what to do anymore and I&#039;m sick of it!<br /><br />I want to have dreams and I want to have crushes but I don&#039;t and as I said so many times,<br /><br />IT&#039;S SO FREAKING UNFAIR.<br /><br />I&#039;m too young and all these experiences and troubles in family, friends, school, and life is just piling and piling. <br /><br />I thought that maybe, this was a phase or something but I&#039;ve always been this way ever since I was young and I&#039;ve only realized it this year.<br /><br />I&#039;ve always been quiet and emo. Even in school, but I changed myself because there were people who teased me so, in a snap, after one summer, wow, I was happy on the outside. People used to say that I was really quiet and I always looked like I was mad and I just realized that I was just really sad. And now that developed into depression. I know you think I&#039;m lying since I&#039;m too young but we&#039;re all different here and we go through different things and I just had to go through many things at a young age.<br /><br />I&#039;m really tired. I really am. I tried everything. I even self harm. I have scars from razors and my parents think it&#039;s something I got from my dad called Keloid wherein you just get tiny scratches and they turn to look like scars and I agreed so they won&#039;t be suspicious. But after awhile, they did of course, so I started to cut elsewhere other than my wrist. <br /><br />Anyways, other than that rather disturbing paragraph, I just want help.<br /><br />I don&#039;t want to be some depressed teenager with anxiety. I hate always being jumpy, nervous and I want to be NORMAL.<br /><br />So. If anyone reads this. Please help me before this gets worse. I&#039;m really tired of feeling this way and I don&#039;t think I can hold my sadness and anger in any longer. I just want to scream at the world that I&#039;m upset and lost and to help me but I can&#039;t. I have no one to talk to. No one I trust.<br /><br />But I know there are people out there who will understand and that&#039;s why I am here now. I don&#039;t like thinking of suicide or anything. I really don&#039;t. And I want it to stop. So if anyone can PLEASE help me, just... HELP ME. <br /><br />Please, I&#039;m begging you. I&#039;m so desperate and I just really need someone to be there for me right now.';
		data[1]['blog_time'] = 'Fri, 08 Nov 2013 09:13:25 -0500';
		

		data[2] = new Array();
		data[2]['title'] = 'Have i become addicted to sex or has my boyfriend lost interest?';
		data[2]['url'] = 'https://www.psychforums.com/blog/Psychology/have_i_become_addicted_to_sex_or_has_my_boyfriend_lost_interest%CA%94_c-3_u-363285_b-10223.html';
		data[2]['url'] = 'https://www.psychforums.com/blog/Psychology/have_i_become_addicted_to_sex_or_has_my_boyfriend_lost_interest%CA%94_c-3_u-363285_b-10223.html';
		data[2]['username'] = 'Lipsydoll';
		data[2]['blog_id'] = '10223';
		data[2]['blog_message'] = 'So this is my first ever post out into the deep dark internet, but there&#039;s an issue I&#039;m my life and my relationship that I honestly don&#039;t feel I can talk to about with anyone, like not him.. none of my friends.. so here I am turning to complete strangers. <br /><br />So me and my boyfriend have been together 6 months now, we met on tinder and we hit it off like a house on fire straight away! He is one of the best people I have ever met, I&#039;m super attracted to him and he actually wants to spend all his time with me which is more than I can say for any of my exes and we have had a great relationship thus far, except for one thing... So I have felt increasingly upset about this as time has gone on, like when we first got together we were exploring each other emotionally and also sexually, and with him being 9 years older than myself, he had a lot more sexual experience than me and he has introduced me to some new areas such an anal and general bum play which I have loved! So the first bit of our relationship, sexually this has been amazing.. but over the last couple of months he has become more tired and less interested in having sex with me, he has never been one to kiss me lots but again in the last couple of months this has diminished into giving me a peck in the morning before he goes to work.. and unless we are actually having sex, I don&#039;t get kisses off him.. he doesn&#039;t ever just snog me, and this hurts. Whenever I talk to him about it I just get &#039;I&#039;m not a lovey dovey kind of person&#039; or &#039;I&#039;m not a snoggy type of person&#039; which is ok, well its not ok.. because from where I&#039;m standing I literally just crave so much more! Since loosing 6-7 stone over the past year I feel my sex drive has sky rocketed and I find myself wanting sex all the time, whenever I&#039;m with him I just want to ###$ him and him do bad things to me, and when I&#039;m alone.. I touch myself. When I&#039;m alone and when I&#039;m not busy I am constantly masturbating, I make myself cum sometimes 3-4 times a day when I have that chance. And so when I&#039;m with this man who makes me so happy and who I am sexually attracted to immensely, I just want him.. and I feel that he doesn&#039;t want me as hard as I want him. When we get into bed and he makes his excuses, bats my hand away from him and tells me he&#039;s tired, I cant help but feel gutted.. I feel deflated, it kills me inside and I have to pretend like its okay and roll over and go to sleep when in fact I&#039;m so hurt. Now, please understand when I say we do have quite regular sex, sometimes we can go a few times in a day, but on average I would say about 4 times a week.. sometimes a lot more? Now, this is where I think I have a slight addiction.. because it doesn&#039;t seem to be enough, I want to feel that intimacy so much more, maybe its because I don&#039;t get the little kisses throughout the day or even that passionate snog in the car before we go for dinner.. He is not the romantic type and unfortunately this massively shows, he never tells me I&#039;m beautiful or says romantic things to me, or does anything romantic, and well 6 months in and he hasn&#039;t told me he loves me. I understand people go at different paces but due to this, I&#039;m left wanting more.. and I&#039;m having wondering thoughts, I&#039;m lusting after anyone at the moment and I hate myself because actually the one person I want the absolute most is my boyfriend. I have tried talking to him, and I just don&#039;t seem to get anywhere.. He doesn&#039;t have much to say and just comes back with the normal &#039;I&#039;m just not the romantic type&#039; and  &#039;I&#039;m just so tired from work&#039;. I feel like he isn&#039;t fully into me? Only apart from the fact he actually wants to see me all the time and literally does anything for me, he looks after me and makes me feel safe, and happy.. But where is my romance? I am a woman, with an incredibly high sex drive who just wants my man to have sex with me all the time and tell me I&#039;m ######6 beautiful!';
		data[2]['blog_time'] = 'Tue, 20 Sep 2016 07:27:37 -0400';
		

		data[3] = new Array();
		data[3]['title'] = 'An Introduction to My Mission';
		data[3]['url'] = 'https://www.psychforums.com/blog/Psychology/an_introduction_to_my_mission_c-3_u-105870_b-5787.html';
		data[3]['url'] = 'https://www.psychforums.com/blog/Psychology/an_introduction_to_my_mission_c-3_u-105870_b-5787.html';
		data[3]['username'] = 'Bunnielight';
		data[3]['blog_id'] = '5787';
		data[3]['blog_message'] = 'Hi there. <br />You may call me Bunnie. I am a 23 year old female who is recently married. While I am completely happy and content with my life, I still carry a lot of baggage on a daily basis and need somewhere to go to write and vent. My mother is believed to have extreme narcissistic personality disorder and has been diagnosed multiple times with bipolar disorder. However, because of her narcissism, any treatment is slapped away. She cannot maintain a stable lifestyle, a job, and refuses to pay rent. She recently got arrested for exactly that and any other information regarding her is simply my grandparents and I digging around trying to find something out.<br /><br />My sister, half sister to be exact, is a 19 year old &quot;mother&quot; of two who recently had her children taken from her by DCS and relocated to a loving family trying their best to deal with the cases appropriately and cooperate with her while she gets her life together. However, her priorities and terrible attitude is questionable regardless of what she claims. She has been told to do numerous things all of which she either ignores or makes sure she does the minimum. I would have dismissed all of this a long time ago and moved on with my life if I didn&#039;t care so much. I want the best because our mother never provided anything for her. I want my nephews to have a good life and to have their mother. It is these reasons that I have tried to be the appropriate rock, but her attitude and my limited affect on this situation, legally, makes it that much harder.<br /><br />Every day I struggle with my role in all of this. I want the best for everyone. I want them to get the help they need. But the stress of it all effects my life on a daily basis. My life is great. I have a stable job and my husband and I are starting our own business. I am a photographer and he is a videographer/producer. If we continue on the path that we are on, we will be highly successful.<br /><br />Which is why I had to find somewhere to turn to vent and give me direction. I need to deal with this appropriately and help who I can where I can without causing more damage than I am helping.<br /><br />I have had blogs over the years but none that I felt comfortable truly venting in. Nowhere that gave me proper feedback or guidance. I came here because I feel like this is where I can find that. Because I definitely need it.<br /><br />-HMD';
		data[3]['blog_time'] = 'Mon, 11 Nov 2013 15:06:41 -0500';
		

		data[4] = new Array();
		data[4]['title'] = 'Trans in denial or....?';
		data[4]['url'] = 'https://www.psychforums.com/blog/Psychology/trans_in_denial_or....%CA%94_c-3_u-409304_b-11056.html';
		data[4]['url'] = 'https://www.psychforums.com/blog/Psychology/trans_in_denial_or....%CA%94_c-3_u-409304_b-11056.html';
		data[4]['username'] = 'strayedcat';
		data[4]['blog_id'] = '11056';
		data[4]['blog_message'] = 'I&#039;ve been having pure o OCD for a long time. I was never properly diagnosed, but I&#039;ve been having obsessions ever since 3rd grade. Lately I started to obsessing over my sexuality, even though I&#039;ve already had a crush on a boy in my school. I got over my HOCD, and after a day of pure relief, when I was scrolling through YouTube, I found a video about a trans. Immediately a thought popped in my head, &quot;What if I am transgender?&quot; I started to obsess over that. I am tomboy-I had a lot of the character traits and humor of boys, my voice sounded slightly deeper than other girls, I was different than other girly girls, I hate pink, my childhood toys were cars, and I even looked kind of like a boy. However, I always loved being a girl. I felt quite comfortable in my body-and I&#039;ve never disliked being called &#039;her&#039; and &#039;she&#039;. I&#039;ve had a lot of fantasies and daydreams, all of which I was a girl. I imagined myself growing old as a girl. I&#039;ve always believed/identified I was female, and that was what I told myself when I first started to obsess. As time worn on, I became less sure. Every time I look in the mirror, I felt ugly and boyish. I don&#039;t want to be transgender. I keep on having unwanted thoughts m=of y=myself as a boy-I don&#039;t want to think about what it ould be like to be male because I&#039;m scared I might like it. I dont know if I&#039;m actually trans in denial or just TOCD. Please help!<br /> <img src="https://www.psychforums.com/images/smilies/icon_sad.gif" alt=":(" title="Sad" />';
		data[4]['blog_time'] = 'Fri, 05 May 2017 21:47:22 -0400';