var title = 'Psychology and Mental Health Forum Psychology Feed';
		var url = 'https://www.psychforums.com/blog/Psychology/random_blogs_c-3.html';
		var site_url = 'https://www.psychforums.com';
		var site_desc = 'Psychology and Mental Health Forum';
		var time = 'Fri, 08 Aug 2025 07:22:46 -0400';

		var data = new Array();
		

		data[0] = new Array();
		data[0]['title'] = 'An Introduction to My Mission';
		data[0]['url'] = 'https://www.psychforums.com/blog/Psychology/an_introduction_to_my_mission_c-3_u-105870_b-5787.html';
		data[0]['url'] = 'https://www.psychforums.com/blog/Psychology/an_introduction_to_my_mission_c-3_u-105870_b-5787.html';
		data[0]['username'] = 'Bunnielight';
		data[0]['blog_id'] = '5787';
		data[0]['blog_message'] = 'Hi there. <br />You may call me Bunnie. I am a 23 year old female who is recently married. While I am completely happy and content with my life, I still carry a lot of baggage on a daily basis and need somewhere to go to write and vent. My mother is believed to have extreme narcissistic personality disorder and has been diagnosed multiple times with bipolar disorder. However, because of her narcissism, any treatment is slapped away. She cannot maintain a stable lifestyle, a job, and refuses to pay rent. She recently got arrested for exactly that and any other information regarding her is simply my grandparents and I digging around trying to find something out.<br /><br />My sister, half sister to be exact, is a 19 year old &quot;mother&quot; of two who recently had her children taken from her by DCS and relocated to a loving family trying their best to deal with the cases appropriately and cooperate with her while she gets her life together. However, her priorities and terrible attitude is questionable regardless of what she claims. She has been told to do numerous things all of which she either ignores or makes sure she does the minimum. I would have dismissed all of this a long time ago and moved on with my life if I didn&#039;t care so much. I want the best because our mother never provided anything for her. I want my nephews to have a good life and to have their mother. It is these reasons that I have tried to be the appropriate rock, but her attitude and my limited affect on this situation, legally, makes it that much harder.<br /><br />Every day I struggle with my role in all of this. I want the best for everyone. I want them to get the help they need. But the stress of it all effects my life on a daily basis. My life is great. I have a stable job and my husband and I are starting our own business. I am a photographer and he is a videographer/producer. If we continue on the path that we are on, we will be highly successful.<br /><br />Which is why I had to find somewhere to turn to vent and give me direction. I need to deal with this appropriately and help who I can where I can without causing more damage than I am helping.<br /><br />I have had blogs over the years but none that I felt comfortable truly venting in. Nowhere that gave me proper feedback or guidance. I came here because I feel like this is where I can find that. Because I definitely need it.<br /><br />-HMD';
		data[0]['blog_time'] = 'Mon, 11 Nov 2013 15:06:41 -0500';
		

		data[1] = new Array();
		data[1]['title'] = 'Intrusive thought I mastorbated to but I feel ashamed';
		data[1]['url'] = 'https://www.psychforums.com/blog/Psychology/intrusive_thought_i_mastorbated_to_but_i_feel_ashamed_c-3_u-136655_b-4297.html';
		data[1]['url'] = 'https://www.psychforums.com/blog/Psychology/intrusive_thought_i_mastorbated_to_but_i_feel_ashamed_c-3_u-136655_b-4297.html';
		data[1]['username'] = 'Ollie319';
		data[1]['blog_id'] = '4297';
		data[1]['blog_message'] = 'I&#039;m 20 and during school break one night decided to masturbate to some porn , and I came across this video and the pornstar looked alot like my mom , the actress had the same hair style my mom always wears and the pornstar was giving oral i like watching oral but she looked to much like my mom so I fast forward to where the porn star is riding the male pornstar and this reminded me of when I was a kid and my mom and her boyfriend would lock themselves in a room for hours and I thought to my self when I was masturbating that this is probably what they were doing , so I imagined the porn stars doing it in the room and this turned me on, but then I thought that it was gross cause that&#039;s what my mom and her boyfriend were doing , so I focused more on the porn star lady cause I just wanted to finish and go to bed , but now I feel like I jacked off to my mom and her boyfriend because It did arouse me a little but I tried finishing to the porn star , I feel sick , I hate that it turned me and that I didn&#039;t stop masturbating , I feel horrible , I was never attracted to my mom and I mastorbated that day because I was horny not cause I wanted to jack off to my mom but that video ****** it up , now I feel ashamed , this is serious , please HELP!';
		data[1]['blog_time'] = 'Wed, 06 Mar 2013 23:32:19 -0500';
		

		data[2] = new Array();
		data[2]['title'] = 'WTF?';
		data[2]['url'] = 'https://www.psychforums.com/blog/Psychology/wtf%CA%94_c-3_u-246885_b-5612.html';
		data[2]['url'] = 'https://www.psychforums.com/blog/Psychology/wtf%CA%94_c-3_u-246885_b-5612.html';
		data[2]['username'] = 'asoulfragmented';
		data[2]['blog_id'] = '5612';
		data[2]['blog_message'] = 'Mood: Exhausted<br />Listening to: Blake Shelton - Sure be cool if you did<br /><br /><br />It is one of those nights where I cannot get my mind to shut up. I am so sleepy but alas it manages to escape me. Racing thoughts and the like, This is my first time online today and it is 4:45 am so I guess that would technically mean that I was not online at all yesterday. I have not been able to focus enough on one thing to read a book. That is very stressful as reading is an outlet for me, I have my youtube playlist playing on shuffle so I don&#039;t even have to make a decision about a song cause right now my mind won&#039;t let me even think on it enough. I thought coming on here and writing for a bit would make me feel better or at least give me something to do but even now it is difficult to focus enough not to stray the subject. I love music there is rarely a time in my life that music is not playing. I listen to just about every genre I can think of with the exception of polka. Lately when I try to go to sleep paranoia takes over, it seems like the moment I become &quot;still&quot; the $#%^ hits the fan so to speak. Paranoia,agitation, conversations in my head with more than one voice. WTF? I moved across the country and have yet to see a therapist or mental health professional for that  matter. I have been off meds since roughly June. I sometimes feel like I am watching my life play in front of me like a movie without the option to react. I mean my body is reacting but I am not, what the hell is that about? The other night I went to bed around 3 am to try to sleep but the moment I stopped listening to music and reading articles online and settled down in my bed with the lights off it got ugly. First the paranoia set in, it was extreme. I felt like I was screaming inside my mind but no sounds escaped me. It seemed endless then a soft little crying voice was in my head like a thought but not my thought. Then the weirdest thing happened.... I got this mental image of a little girl crying holding a teddy bear curled up in a corner. I don&#039;t know how I knew but the little girls name is Sophia and she is 6. I have never seen this little girl before so how would I know her in my mind? Let me say this, My name is not Sophia and I have never personally met anyone by that name. After the image of the little girl left the &quot;screaming&quot; in my head started back up. I don&#039;t know.... I am lost and not sure what is going on. After that night I called and made an appointment with a dr in the new town I am in. I am nervous about going to a new dr, I do not trust easily and I don&#039;t know if I can open up to them. <img src="https://www.psychforums.com/images/smilies/icon_confused.gif" alt=":?" title="Confused" />';
		data[2]['blog_time'] = 'Sat, 19 Oct 2013 05:48:44 -0400';
		

		data[3] = new Array();
		data[3]['title'] = 'Do I have Conduct Disorder?';
		data[3]['url'] = 'https://www.psychforums.com/blog/Psychology/do_i_have_conduct_disorder%CA%94_c-3_u-320081_b-9432.html';
		data[3]['url'] = 'https://www.psychforums.com/blog/Psychology/do_i_have_conduct_disorder%CA%94_c-3_u-320081_b-9432.html';
		data[3]['username'] = '3rr0r';
		data[3]['blog_id'] = '9432';
		data[3]['blog_message'] = 'Hello, I am a slightly troubled teenager. All my life (besides my ADHD) I didn&#039;t really think I had any psychiatric problems. Then, when I was 13 years old, I stumbled upon conduct and antisocial personality disorder when I was browsing the internet. Intrigued by the similarities I had with the disorders (conduct disorder since I&#039;m not 18). My symptoms tend to be more related to primary psychopathy (high functioning antisocial personality disorder)  than conduct related though.<br /><br />. I am unable to form real connections with others (including family), and only make friends for monetary, reputable, or general control purposes.<br />. I enjoy causing pain and am aggressive, which has caused me to get into a lot of fights.<br />. I am manipulative, and don&#039;t have symptoms of lying, which has allowed me to get people to do things for me, and has gotten me out of psychiatric evaluation multiple times<br />. I have a group of &quot;friends&quot; (slaves), that are stupid, violent, and easily manipulative, that I get to fight with others, and generally intimidate people since I am pretty weak and don&#039;t want to get in trouble. <br />. I have VERY high self worth, and think everyone I know is below me. I want to control people.<br />. Whenever I see a person in pain (even if I caused it), I feel nothing.<br />. I never understood why people feel guilty, since I have never felt guilt for any of my actions.<br />. I don&#039;t understand altruism and have no desire to help others.<br /><br />If I do have conduct disorder, I have already learned how to blend in reasonably well. I am also very intelligent (My IQ is 157). I would really like for people who actually have conduct disorder to see if my symptoms show signs (not a professional diagnosis obviously) of conduct disorder.';
		data[3]['blog_time'] = 'Tue, 05 Jan 2016 00:13:05 -0500';
		

		data[4] = new Array();
		data[4]['title'] = 'Is this weird? I'm having unwanted sexual thoughts and anxiety';
		data[4]['url'] = 'https://www.psychforums.com/blog/Psychology/is_this_weird%CA%94_i%CA%B9m_having_unwanted_sexual_thoughts_and_anxiety_c-3_u-262074_b-7157.html';
		data[4]['url'] = 'https://www.psychforums.com/blog/Psychology/is_this_weird%CA%94_i%CA%B9m_having_unwanted_sexual_thoughts_and_anxiety_c-3_u-262074_b-7157.html';
		data[4]['username'] = 'Sadcandice';
		data[4]['blog_id'] = '7157';
		data[4]['blog_message'] = 'Hello. I have been diagnosed with anxiety for a few years now. I am a sixteen year old girl, and I often struggle with intrusive thoughts. My latest anxiety has been sexual thoughts, and feeling guilty about everything. For example, my mom was doing something (I don&#039;t even remember what) and was sitting down and was in her underwear, though i couldn&#039;t tell if she was naked or not. I looked over at her for whatever reason and just kind of instinctively looked down at her crotch area (I have no idea why I do that when I accidentally see someone naked, even a family member) and afterwards, I felt like I looked too long or it was creepy of me. I have no attraction to my mother or anything. But my anxiety has been making me worry about it all day. I even kind of forced myself to glance at hers and other people&#039;s butts to prove to myself that it wasn&#039;t weird and they&#039;re just body parts, etc.  But this kind of thing happens to me constantly, especially when I&#039;m tired. I also always feel guilty and like I&#039;m hurting my boyfriend for having these thoughts and doing these things. Is it weird that I glanced at my mom like that? I&#039;m sorry if this is a strange question, but I appreciate your answers. Peace and love.';
		data[4]['blog_time'] = 'Mon, 30 Jun 2014 20:52:34 -0400';