My goal is to get my life back on line, without the people I grew up with or the background I remember; meaning; without their help! Thank God! Only God can pull this off!
I forgive all those thieves and liars I was forced to grow up with and their sick horrific child abuses towards me and others! May I never see them again, may God forgive me and protect me and keep me economically alive for a better day on planet earth!
Women;
More n more, its about the Universe and God! Who will God bring! I have to be the type of person Im looking for!
Economics; unfortunately, there is none! However, this does not mean God is not going to come through for me in several areas!
Economics mean; I must give her a chance anyway! Let her know! And if she does not want it; I can move on! Meaning; want me! My economic situation could change; thats up to God!
The Universe does a fairly good job with women! Meaning, Ive been sent wonderful women from God!
On my own; I look at their bodies and faces and always pic hot girls that are the wrong personality types!
It never works for me when the personality is wrong!
I have to start with the right personality type!
IVe been around the wrong women! The women from the groups and meetings, they are scavengers! They are manipulative and liars! And like to use men and play them into the ground! It's a big waist of time for me!
I have to trust God; he will bring me to the right people! He will, I have to become the type of person Im interested in! Im not sure how economics will work into this! I don't know!
I call out to the Universe for the right women that fit me! Im at that point! Ive never been one to hit on a bunch of adult women! Well, I would if I was around them! Ill sleep with all of them! And I can sleep with many of them if I knew where they were! And I might start looking! Looking around meeting new people! This requires more social skills! And that I like myself more! And it requires that I talk to people and respond to them with the truth and see what happens! This is still hard! Im gong to rely on God, and rely on many other things!
I feel like a 14 year old that is waking up again! I will have to find women; or God will bring me adult women with the same vibration interest level!
Who will I be interested in this time!
IVe had blocks from my past; passed down from the psychopaths! I was very confused and damaged of who I really am! I rejected my original self because I could not protect myself! So I felt the original me was not worth much! So, I became someone else! And that rebellious state did not work! And that state was ran by the psychopaths! Meaning, fueled by them!
Now, when I think of who I am and the horrible hurt that goes with it; and the deep wounds thrown down my life that destroyed me! I still remember the real me! The decent person that no one else ever saw! Or, the wrong animals saw it! And they didn't care! All I could do was either go into addiction or run away!
Now, Im remembering more of the good part of who I am, and Im wondering who God will bring my direction!
Ive seen those that are not from God that iVe associated with; they seem to have no appreciation for any part of me!
If someone cant have a conversations with me! I skip them! I don't like manipulators!
Ive not been around the right people because Ive been to week to be around the right people! Im still in recovery! Im slowly getting better; Im not myself yet!