Our partner

User avatar
OMNICELL
Consumer 6
Consumer 6
 
Posts: 1035
Joined: Tue Nov 15, 2011 5:06 am
Blog: View Blog (948)
Archives
- July 2019
I have CPTSD
   Wed Jul 17, 2019 4:47 pm
Real changes are occurring
   Tue Jul 16, 2019 10:46 am
Coming back into the present
   Tue Jul 16, 2019 2:32 am
Im extremely frustrated
   Mon Jul 15, 2019 11:14 pm
Fining myself or facing myself
   Mon Jul 15, 2019 8:39 pm
Im beginning to understand
   Sun Jul 14, 2019 3:30 pm
Visualizing
   Fri Jul 12, 2019 8:28 pm
Starting from the beginning
   Fri Jul 12, 2019 3:35 pm
The trap house part 2
   Fri Jul 12, 2019 3:13 pm
The trap house; I only knew about; In the end I win
   Fri Jul 12, 2019 1:15 am
Massive Mega paradigm shift
   Thu Jul 11, 2019 3:01 pm
First post recovery conversation
   Wed Jul 10, 2019 9:55 pm
Dating and Art
   Wed Jul 10, 2019 4:44 pm
movement
   Tue Jul 09, 2019 5:56 pm
childhood abandonment
   Mon Jul 08, 2019 3:23 pm
Being single
   Mon Jul 08, 2019 3:53 am
Preview: PTSD; High School
   Sat Jul 06, 2019 10:31 pm
Fear
   Sat Jul 06, 2019 4:34 pm
Ive found some answers
   Sat Jul 06, 2019 12:41 pm
D.I.D; let me introduce myself
   Sat Jul 06, 2019 12:23 pm
PTSD; dealing with triggers.
   Fri Jul 05, 2019 5:32 am
Making me into a loser; its all about the critical voice
   Thu Jul 04, 2019 6:08 pm
Molding sound like clay; having reasons; Things are changing
   Wed Jul 03, 2019 4:25 pm
critical voice
   Wed Jul 03, 2019 6:38 am
Toxic shame
   Tue Jul 02, 2019 11:05 pm
Ive found some answers
   Tue Jul 02, 2019 7:59 am

+ June 2019
+ May 2019
+ April 2019
+ March 2019
+ February 2019
+ January 2019
+ December 2018
+ November 2018
+ October 2018
+ September 2018
+ August 2018
+ July 2018
+ June 2018
+ May 2018
+ April 2018
+ March 2018
+ February 2018
+ January 2018
+ December 2017
+ November 2017
+ October 2017
+ September 2017
+ August 2017
+ July 2017
+ June 2017
+ May 2017
+ April 2017
+ March 2017
+ February 2017
+ January 2017
+ December 2016
+ November 2016
+ September 2016
+ August 2016
+ July 2016
+ June 2016
+ May 2016
+ April 2016
+ March 2016
+ February 2016
+ January 2016
+ December 2015
+ November 2015
+ October 2015
+ September 2015
+ August 2015
+ April 2015
+ March 2015
+ February 2015
+ January 2015
+ December 2014
+ November 2014
+ October 2014
+ September 2014
+ August 2014
+ July 2014
+ June 2014
+ May 2014
+ April 2014
+ March 2014
+ February 2014
+ January 2014
+ December 2013
+ November 2013
+ October 2013
+ September 2013
+ August 2013
+ July 2013
+ June 2013
+ May 2013
+ April 2013
+ March 2013
+ February 2013
+ January 2013
+ December 2012
+ November 2012
+ October 2012
+ September 2012
+ August 2012
+ July 2012
+ June 2012
+ May 2012
+ April 2012
+ March 2012
+ February 2012
+ January 2012
+ December 2011
+ November 2011
Search Blogs

Trusting people again

Permanent Linkby OMNICELL on Sun Sep 16, 2018 2:15 pm

Trusting people means decent people; not the people at some of the chemical based recovery meetings I go to; Ive written most of them off! The problem is; when sociopaths from the jails show up; some of them will start taking over the meetings; acting like their the head king pins of the meetings; this attracts others like them!
.
Imagine you have 10 people with chemical addictions! 5 out of the 10 are criminals with criminal minds; in n out of DOC. Soon; if sociopaths take over the meetings acting as leaders; this could include a man/women team; they will attract more addicts like themselves; not all addicts are criminals! Many in this day n age are regular people with a problem! However, the bad crop from this bunch will take over and bring their friends along; and this will attract more sociopathic people; Soon, the recovery process is full of active minded criminals looking to become clean or sober or relieved from hurts habits and hang ups; still criminal minded with no conscious! Soon; the whole room is filled with this level of people! The good people are driven out; the evil remains! New people show up and buy into this! Soon; the good people of that crew leaving; leaving a full room of twisted warped people with no conscious. When I attempt to sit with these people; one is OK if they dont need anything from these people because they are not safe! However, no one I know goes into the recovery process not needing a social life! If Im in a group of people; Im going to attempt to try to get close to someone! In my case; I get hurt; they are a bunch of criminal; including the women!
.
Women in meetings! ITs hard; a good looking women comes into the meetings; she looks normal, acts intelligent! I find out the hard way she is a predator like the rest of them! She plays me while taking interest in another guy at the same time and could care less! I go into shock and leave the meetings because their not safe! And their not; not while peopler attempting to get my affections simply for the sadistic pleasure of hurting someone! Who would want to spend their time in a place like that! Ive been hurt so many times; I cant describe it!
.
Why would I go to the recovery process; I have no other life outside it!
.
Im now seriously trying to Got the universe/God to help me heal and find other people to associate with! I have to heal up first; its happening!
.
Ive found that I attract certain people and many I do not!
.
I have to learn how to attract regular people!
.
I want a girlfriend; for obvious reasons; companionship! I have to get over the past! move on! Its complicated now that I wont take anyone seriously unless they have an Asian background; I did a soulmate search and thats that!
.
.
Trusting people again; this has to do with meeting new people and learning to have my guard up and feel safe!
.
Having boundaries in tact! Thats what this means! Its very hard to face people and have boundaries; I have to much PTSD concerning what happened to me; my life being thrown away completely with no regard for it or for my future or for any other concepts! I was moved away and thrown away! nothing I could do put watch my precious life slowly destroyed in front of me until I was no more!
.
Im now in a new life; and attempting to come out of the old one! and its happening; its a scary ride; I have no idea of my limits or limitation concerning my fears! I was unable to get close to anyone for a large part of my life! Now; Im attempting it again; its like going out into a pool full of sharks and alligators while someone tells me their tame and wont hurt anyone; Ill have to find out for myself! or learn to avoid them!

Dissociative Disorder
CPTSD
AVPD; Social avoidance
Previous/Psychotic clinical Depression
agoraphobia
obsessive/compulsive disorder
Evolution didn't stop my death, God did .....Now what?
0 Comments Viewed 793 times

Who is online

Registered users: 58gambling, Allcoulors, Baidu [Spider], Bing [Bot], birdsong87, Cantdoitalone, cyfur, Exabot [Bot], fireheart, Fool, Google [Bot], Google Adsense [Bot], Google Feedfetcher, Majestic-12 [Bot], MakersDozn, NewLife2017, pinkdestruct, Scarlett5, souleire, Zor