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https://www.psychforums.com/blog/OMNICELL/the_real_me%3B_starting_to_show_signs_of_alignment_b-13456_sid-e63b8ff4002cbe8b65cd622227f201ef.html |
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| Author: | OMNICELL [ Wed Oct 28, 2020 10:11 am ] |
| Blog Subject: | The real me; starting to show signs of alignment |
This is good; the real me is starting to show signs of alignment.. . Im starting to call people to go do things. Its the chance taking of calling; and of course; if they actually show up; that is great to. . Starting to open up to quality women. A quality women is a trustworthy women; they are not free; and not so easy to talk to unless Im serious... They have been allowing me to open up to them and talk; its great. the dissociative wall; Im slowly penetrating to the other side. . As I grow; bad people still showing up around me; but; thats normal when one is about to have a paradigm shift. . New thoughts and stabilities are showing up. Im seeing myself around more productive poeple; within my imagination Im seeing it. . Im seeing a picture of my wife in my imagination; I dont see her face completely but I see her work ethic and enthusiasm for work. In my imagination I see her working and speaking and being a leader and enthusiastic... I kind of collage women productive. Middle class; big family; or traditional family system kind of thing. . Im staring to out grow the convict population of men and women at the meetings I attend. Women I was once interested in; scare me... I have a healthy fear of them; they should be locked up on one side of me much like the interior of a jail system; one side for the convicts; one side for the visitors and guards; but the 2 should never meet because the convicts are predators with no social boundaries; lawless and will destroy anything and everything they can get their hands on for supply; sociopaths. . So; Im staring to out grow them; those in the meetings. My goal being to interact and be part of the outside world again. . Im slowly connecting to the outside world again. . Im working on new stories of my life with people in relationships; and its working to take me beyond my old belief systems. And Im starting to show emotions in my story because they are starting to come fourth. . Im interested in having a loving wife; Im working toward this. Its getting stronger and stronger and more confident in nature. God is throwing at me; what I want in her I have to become. If I want her to be trustworthy; I have to be trustworthy to attract it. Heres the deal; if I want more from her character; love; kindness, understanding, caring,. adorability, a best friend heart; I have to be all these things... If I want her to say; I am your wife and I love you; I have to say; I am your husband and I love you.. And I have to be at that frequency of love. I have to be up to that frequency... . So; Im slowly working on new stories. What will I bring to my wife. I will grab her hands all the time and pray for her right then... pray with her... I will love her from the top of her head to the bottom of her feet unconditionally and I will feel this way first before we develop.... She will be my soulmate first and my best friend. All things I want from her; I will have to have first. . . The dissociative wall. This wall has kept me from getting close to people for many years; its now starting to less'n a bit. Im able to penetrate the wall in some ways; I've been doing this with women lately. I need this ability because the women Im interested in dating; Ill have to tell them something about myself to keep them. I cant just avoid them... Ill never get anywhere that way. Im working on all things. . Im back going to meetings; I've been gone for about 2 months... the goal is; stay away from meetings and grow spiritually with God directly and start planning how I want to live in the real world. And I am.... . . |
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