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OMNICELL
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Consumer 6
 
Posts: 1035
Joined: Tue Nov 15, 2011 5:06 am
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- September 2019
One off the more nasty brutal parts of healing
   Fri Sep 13, 2019 4:52 pm
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   Thu Sep 12, 2019 6:22 am
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   Tue Sep 03, 2019 4:33 am

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The problem remains!

Permanent Linkby OMNICELL on Fri Aug 21, 2015 6:11 pm

The problem remains; I have to get rid of my associations with the crooks of my past! They are psychopaths and sociopaths that ripped me of, took all the family money, ruined everyones lives! Very bad and dangerous people; they hurt children!

I was brainwashed by them with young and did not know what was going on! Im dam mad that anyone had the right to my life; to ruin it!

Im lucky to be alive or to be present at the level of presence!

They must go; searching the past for who I am, over n over! And remember the independent good things and solid times and places! Im attempting to forget or work through the bad things; the bullies or family bullies from a bad family system that controlled me and broke my will to live! And broke my life!

I had no time to protect myself; I did not know what was going on!

Letting go of the false friends I never really had! It was all a lie! They could careless if I was dead or alive! I saw them as closer then a brother! Seems, Im the one with all the family decency and values! I have to step back and get away from these people!

The work is the work; getting these people out of my nervous system! There is a lonely broken boy in me! And I have to release the past that I may live again on planet earth! I must start over again from the beginning!

I had no one and nothing from the beginning and I have to work to release these people that have robbed me!

I must go into the past and release them! They were never who they claimed to be! They were sociopaths and psychopath! And nothing more! They don't exist! Their history does not exist! They are trouble makers and nothing more! I have to do the work to release them and forget I ever met them!

I must learn to turn and trust God!

ITs toward God I must go! I have to work on these names; those that have hurt me! Release them; work on forgiveness and past issues that I see clearly who Im dealing with!

I had allot of plans when I was young, but no support! Why did I not have support ! There was no support to start with! These were my enemies! Why don't I know this! This is where the work is! The enemies must go not stay!

I am not winning by keeping my enemies captive within my personality and anxiety and resentments! They must go! I have to get them and their way of life and anything they've done to me; out of my system! They most go! All of it!

Im trying to come back; Im trying to get my identity back; and move forward with its desires!

Dissociative Disorder
CPTSD
AVPD; Social avoidance
Previous/Psychotic clinical Depression
agoraphobia
obsessive/compulsive disorder
Evolution didn't stop my death, God did .....Now what?
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