Im in the middle or the begging of the next gap! what does the gap look like!
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My childhood thinking is all I have! I was locked into it from dissociative disorder and trauma culture!
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Im now moving past it! However, Im not used to having stability outside my general thinking of my childhood! My childhood thinking is all that I had! and all that I have! However, something new has appeared!
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Because of my intense, long term and complex recovery system; a system that breaks down into three parts; Ive some how created or God has created a life that is sneaking up on me from underneath, and placing itself with in me!
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Ive been creating a new life for myself and I didnt know it! its showing up in a very positive wonderful sense!
My recovery process has created life interests; just like bank account interest! I have more life developed then I knew about!
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As I get better, a solid life is stationing itself in my brain!
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The most important aspect of my life is; the ability to have lost years off my childhood and adolescence and yearly teen years, later teen years, have them re done and filled in new! This means the old is taken out; everything is strengthened, and a new life experience for developing takes its place! I no longer have to look in the past for my lost life or lonely present life! I do not have to have a lonely present life! Because the gaps are filled in or filling in continually, I get to have a present life any way I imagine! And its happening for me!
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The greatest achievement is the idea and feeling that Im independent, feel good and free, and looking forward to what I want, not the way things are! Then run and call the shots for myself, no one else; nothing else!