Small apartment and to much stuff. I may only keep on item from my older brothers death. Maybe 2. a hat; a sweater or something and thats it... Some drum sticks.... but nothing more; I cant keep it in my apartment. its all 2 much...
I went crazy and bought 170 model kits; plastic model kits; over 6 grand worth. covid money for half of it; and the rest over a few years time... saving and monthly buying. And Ill pray about it; I may have to give some of it up; it did its job. But its eating up space... Ill pray about what Im suppose to do with it.
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Ive got to clean up my place. Really get into it. Im now getting hit with small stuff and it all has to get organized. Ive got allot of stuff that represents things of a specific nature; like music and art. and other things but I dont use it or need it. just throw away stuff at this point; nice stuff; but eating up all my space. Ill pray about it and get organized.. I will...
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Im in the process of looking at car and women. And how to get closer to either; Ill have to work with God on this; I have been. Character flaws are part of the deal... The other part is earning my way. The car thing is starting to make sense. I have friends that are helping and I work with God to learn my first car; what ever that will mean. Ill have to keep working with God on this...
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As for women; Ill have to earn my first girlfriend. Real girlfriend. All other situations never existed; they never got started; all do to mental health; I was mentally ill and should have been in a hospital; instead; I found myself at some girls house catatonic... I mean; it didnt last longer then a few hours being around her and it was over. It never started to even be over... I stayed inside my mind. I was never outward or present. I guess I was mad about all that. but I was worse mad about my life being destroyed when young... cut off completely.
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Now I have to start over and become another person. As for women; Ill have to ask them for help.
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I found it was hard to ask my friend for help with the car... my pride; its the same with women. Im angry; I dont like being ripped off. I dont want to be around anyone that is going to hurt me.... So; I have to work with the universe and keep it up. Its up to me; Im not God; I have to do the footwork.
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Im not God; I have to do the footwork...
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I talk about it allot at mens meetings. What do I want.... I have to learn how to manage my life; my stuff. Everything; especially my home stuff right now... I have to much stuff. this doesnt work...