I was just miffed because I wanted to send a message to someone about a little girl..
I have no reputation in my meetings.. nothing... I am hated by the women because I don't give them the time of day... they think they have it going on..
Women like a man to have status... these women are not smart enough to understand that I have status... They cant put 2 and 2 together that I need not show them any status... I have it ... I don't care if they know that I have it... Therefore, I act as if I have none... I learned a lesson today...
Im praying for a little girl in my meetings that Im worried about... However, no one in the meetings knows this... No one in the meetings knows me... not the real me... Or that I would pray for children or anyone else...
The lesson:
I found out the girls mom is Ok; she has not been to meetings for awhile... I talked to the mothers spencer and let her know that I was thinking about the little girl and concerned about her.... However, the sponsor looked at me like Im a good for nothing predator with no status that aught to mind his own business. That Im unsafe and everyone knows it... And that I am a weakling that is scared of everyone and not to be taken seriously.... In no way did I have permission to think about this mother or her child as I am not of the quality to do so...
Here is the problem...
No one knows me... I have no credibility at these meetings with many people.. Some of the people are to stupid: Im not safe according to these people.. They make up stuff about people... If your on the negative end of the stick then your sunk... Im on the negative end of the stick with many women in the meetings because they are arrogant and stupid... Not all =!
With the women, My reputation is shot... They think Im a weakling... And should not be trusted... Im certainly no one to know or confide in... Contempt is the best word to describe what others think of me... Not everyone... They think they are better them me, that Im a scuffler shiftless weakling...
I let the sponsor know that I am praying for the mother and the child...
Im learned that I cannot walk up to someone and tell them how I feel about someone else in the meeting without having status... I need status to talk about others people at the meetings, even if its innocent concern...
This thing may backfire in my face....
I have to remember the meetings Im going to.... This is a rough crowd of people...
At-least I took a chance....