| Psychology and Mental Health Forum | |
https://www.psychforums.com/blog/OMNICELL/stuck_between_2_worlds_b-7906_sid-11e82c7f9169ff84a8b5a0afcc9c299f.html |
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| Author: | OMNICELL [ Wed Jan 14, 2015 5:40 am ] |
| Blog Subject: | Stuck between 2 worlds |
The First world, is the recovery world and everyone in it! Ive found that when I was sick; most treated me as helpless and harmless! However, as Ive gotten better, Im being treated with contempt, rivalry and hastily! I have found as I get better; Several people turning on me! I do not think they were ever with me; on my side! I never knew, I was not present! So, low level recovery processes! dealing with street people and the equivalent! nOt everyone! More, new people to recover process! ---------------------- Second world; advanced spiritual concepts by world people with great success! those who use Attraction techniques to run their lives and money and business! all advanced spiritual techniques for success! ----------- In the middle of this is the online communities I use for expression and communication and connection! Problem; In between all this is loneliness and disconnection! Technically, Im still alone! and I have few friends! But the recovery process is working! I was destroyed by sociopaths when young, and Im winning the fight to come back to life! and for that I am grateful! However, I am nowhere near up to speed or connected into the present! There is a jump factor! a bridge must be built from the past to the present for me to jump or walk into the present! I must walk in as the sunny child I once was before I was destroyed! And this might be possible! probable! it will take time! To be able to walk or jump into the present, I must have my own life back; not stolen by those of the past! I must work my way into a new way of thinking and a new life! I am still very insecure! and stolen! It will take time; I must have my independent memories of my past! they must be back with me! I was independent as a boy; at times! went to school, had my own thoughts! I was protected by my father; for awhile! I made the horrible mistake of ever going around the mother figure of the house hold! Once she abounded everyone; I should have stayed away! and it is this process Im working on letting go! Im working through it! so its painful and hard! and will be for some time! |
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