Im a sitting duck in the recovery process! Ive been their a long long time! others come along and intimidate! Im sitting their and they got to be noticed by walking up to me and breaking my personal space! This allows others to see it! thats why its being done; its to show dominance! the problem is; Im at a meeting or recovery place to get better, not to deal with people trying to show dominance! Their taking advantage of me!
Its the kind of meeting situation; its not worth fighting the people in the meeting; they are limited; I must remember this! the problem is; I need other places to go! Im running out of places to go!
I need to recover! its getting harder where Im getting recovery! Im working with God on this!
I have to keep working with God! Im getting better!
I dont used drugs to cover pain anymore! Im not going to commit suicide! I dont even feel it anymore! The only path left is to trust God, work with God, and recover! and I need recovery places for this! places set up for recovery! you dont know who your getting in the recovery rooms! However, when I get cornered and intimidated! I dont like it! I want to be somewhere else! However, considering the type of meeting places! I cant expect anything more! I simply cannot or Im in denial or some type of dream world!
I must work with God continuously concerning this matter!
The problem is safety; being around safe people ! certainly, I would think I can get a grip on this! Im not in a safe place in some of the recovery areas! why would I think so; I get used to them being safe! but they were never safe! so, I must work with God on this subject!
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My recovery process is going great! probably as good or better then anyone on this site! Meaning, its going great! the problem is, Im 54 years old! I want it to hurry up so I can get better and quit playing the martyr victim!
Victimhood is what I have left! its the next big hurdle! Passive aggression! being submissive, non assertive! I have real problems around people! I clamp down on my emotions and wont express myself around people! People take advantage of me!
Im to alone!
The goal is to be happy! the problem is; I dont know where! where am I suppose to be happy at!
I would like my world to expand! I must pray for this! keep praying and working with the laws of attraction!
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The goal here; my recovery process is to let go of codependency! This means the people of the past and have God replace them with someone else! Im still waiting on the other people that are to show up! I guess I have to actually believe that others are going to show up! I have to work on this! in order for this to happen; I have to become the person I want to attract! Im seeing it in my mind! it is possible! I have allot of work to do first!
Im still not handling conflict well! Im not very good at meeting people! Ive hardly gotten used to the idea that Im OK! or that others will accept me! Im very shy in this way! Im hoping to meet the right people and stay away from the wrong ones!