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OMNICELL
Consumer 6
Consumer 6
 
Posts: 1035
Joined: Tue Nov 15, 2011 5:06 am
Blog: View Blog (948)
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- July 2019
I have CPTSD
   Wed Jul 17, 2019 4:47 pm
Real changes are occurring
   Tue Jul 16, 2019 10:46 am
Coming back into the present
   Tue Jul 16, 2019 2:32 am
Im extremely frustrated
   Mon Jul 15, 2019 11:14 pm
Fining myself or facing myself
   Mon Jul 15, 2019 8:39 pm
Im beginning to understand
   Sun Jul 14, 2019 3:30 pm
Visualizing
   Fri Jul 12, 2019 8:28 pm
Starting from the beginning
   Fri Jul 12, 2019 3:35 pm
The trap house part 2
   Fri Jul 12, 2019 3:13 pm
The trap house; I only knew about; In the end I win
   Fri Jul 12, 2019 1:15 am
Massive Mega paradigm shift
   Thu Jul 11, 2019 3:01 pm
First post recovery conversation
   Wed Jul 10, 2019 9:55 pm
Dating and Art
   Wed Jul 10, 2019 4:44 pm
movement
   Tue Jul 09, 2019 5:56 pm
childhood abandonment
   Mon Jul 08, 2019 3:23 pm
Being single
   Mon Jul 08, 2019 3:53 am
Preview: PTSD; High School
   Sat Jul 06, 2019 10:31 pm
Fear
   Sat Jul 06, 2019 4:34 pm
Ive found some answers
   Sat Jul 06, 2019 12:41 pm
D.I.D; let me introduce myself
   Sat Jul 06, 2019 12:23 pm
PTSD; dealing with triggers.
   Fri Jul 05, 2019 5:32 am
Making me into a loser; its all about the critical voice
   Thu Jul 04, 2019 6:08 pm
Molding sound like clay; having reasons; Things are changing
   Wed Jul 03, 2019 4:25 pm
critical voice
   Wed Jul 03, 2019 6:38 am
Toxic shame
   Tue Jul 02, 2019 11:05 pm
Ive found some answers
   Tue Jul 02, 2019 7:59 am

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Starting point!

Permanent Linkby OMNICELL on Wed Sep 30, 2015 11:22 pm

And Im starting to see it!

Those from the past!

As I get better, Im seeing what I blocked off! Im seeing Satan! Im seeing the devil! Im seeing the devil in my best friend and his family! No ######6 wonder God was humorous about the whole thing! He was laughing at me or with me! He was trying to explain to me; " I do not know those people, they are not in my book of life"! I did not understand how this could be! Now I know! As I get better, and better within his realm; now I see it!

Ive seen psychopaths like wolves within the meetings I attend! And I see it! The family system I thought were my friends! They are the same way! They are like wolves with fangs! All animals! All animal, no human! Nothing human! Complete demonic!

And I see different forms of Satan in many people that have approached me! Or that I have approached!


It's my job to figure out what really happened when I was young! It's no game! I was genicided out of my life very young! It was deliberate! It's my job to look at it; figure it out, fix what I can and move on!

The idea is to get my life back and let go of those from the past! Im not a sociopath! So it's not easy for me! Im a sensitive human being! It makes things impossible!

You have to keep working at this; over n over n over!

Its about my addiction to mom and dad! To my mom and dad! A child wants to feel proud of something! All they have is their mom and dad! Take that away, and they are crushed!

And I was crushed! Now Im looking for solutions to be uncrushed!

Im slowly working on this! It's slowly happening! When and as I work through the issues with my mother and father, all other issues get better!

Im still living a double life and have not began to change!

I attract women; my fair share; but I cant feel comfortable with them until I can tell them the truth!~
I live in an apartment and don't have much in the way of money! I certainly don't tell them bluntly at the top! However, its about being afraid to approach them because of my economic insecurities

Live learned that I have to quit living a double life and learn to tell people the truth!

And thats where Im headed!

Dissociative Disorder
CPTSD
AVPD; Social avoidance
Previous/Psychotic clinical Depression
agoraphobia
obsessive/compulsive disorder
Evolution didn't stop my death, God did .....Now what?
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