| Psychology and Mental Health Forum | |
https://www.psychforums.com/blog/OMNICELL/somewhere_in_time_b-12792_sid-2e822636cdb9d05e4a8b990c24fd19ff.html |
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| Author: | OMNICELL [ Fri May 17, 2019 6:01 am ] |
| Blog Subject: | Somewhere in time |
Not sure how I see my life. Im working with the universes. . Im not sure where its at; I have to keep working at it. . The people I associate with; not all are very good. Ive had problems with some people; Im alone. . Its strange; Im alone and I keep working on it; on life; Im MGTOW; and have been that way all my life; purple pill. . Ive always had my eyes open; but dealing with women has been useless. They lie most of the time and dont care. I remember a women that liked me; she abused her children and throw them away so could get my attention; when I saw this; it was over before it started. And this is an example of many situations. . With women; Im only interested in women Im interested in; no one else. . Im working with the universe. . I would like to be in a relationship; but that has to do with money; or my interest in money. . I believe in goals and the continuation of interest in goals. . I dont date; Im not sure who to date. and I have massive problems taking risks; loneliness drives me to look for a better life. Im attempting to let go of my fears; this is hard because Ive been damaged; and I dont want to be damaged anymore; it is getting better. . Im attractive to women; but as I get older; how long will it last. . Im scared of not being attractive because of age but Ive never had money. . Ill have to work with the universe; Im scared of letting go of my past my mother and my past house I lived in. Im scared because of the horror and fear I felt when it happened the first time. I dont want to be forced into reliving that. . Im still going to 12 step meetings; and its helping me but I didnt know I need all that help; Im stuck between worlds right now; Im attempting to break into the real world but that work requires more faith in the universe. . Risk taking is something ive not been good at because I dont like my arms getting ripped off. My value as a person seems to be nothing in this disposable society; so I have to turn to something else. . Not having money has stopped all interest in women. its a giant wall. But Im not blaming women for this; its my inability to take chances and look at myself. . losing weight is getting harder to do; but can be done; its what I want. . I dont like being alone; I have no one; no family; and Im disposable in society. So; I must work with the universe for help. . working with the universe is the problem. trusting the universe is the problem. the universe has to show up; but I have to take chances with the universe; and thats hard. very hard in fact; that could be a blog onto itself. . I seem to have no value to women in this age. The women I have attracted is because they found me physically attractive but disposable. So; they are complete strangers. In the past; I had many women that liked me because they could either have a baby with me or they wanted me to take care of their children. I was interested in neither. . God/Universe brings me who or what I want; and having very little until that time puts pressure on me. . Im working, to work through this stuck bottleneck concerning the universe; trusting the universe. . |
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