I was betrayed by the people I thought were my friends; when I was in trouble! They quickly left and shut their doors in my face as if they had never known me! I had no where to turn; no one to talk to! They tried to crucify me!
They tried to kill me! They tried because Im a decent person!
Im a decent man; thats why they wanted me dead!
Im just barely waking up! I have enough mental strength for small hellos and other stuff! Meaning, when Im outside!
Interacting with the world is a tuff thing horrible thing!
I was this way in college before I went to sleep for 30 years!
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Its funny how the outside world does not know you! They see a complete opposite person of who you are!
They know, no depth of you; nothing!
You are never known by anyone!
Tonight at a meeting; the topic was relationships and addiction! When it was my turn to speak! I had nothing to speak on! Ive had no relationships! I remember when I was a boy and what happened to me! And later being molested and played by psychopaths! And then, thrown away again and again by people and society! And I finally went insane! And here I am now!
No relationships! Ive had relationships in my head! Im dealing with the past all the time; PTSD! Yet, in reality, no relationship! Only the family I was mangled in as a boy, then nothing!