As for women in general; a major problem has come up with all is trajectory; my mother. I want to find women just like my mother to love and complete the love I wanted to give her. So; Im a little child who wants to love my mother and receive love from her and feel safe. ... and learn to love her again...
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I want to feel safe; I want her to protect me; I want to feel safe; I want her to love me so I can feel safe and taken care of....
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The problem. I see loving women; or affectionate women who could love me and I love them. But a problem exists; plenty of sociopathic women who have no boundaries or standards; lawless; they hang out with men that are corrupted criminal types with nothing; murder's basically and feel right at home; they may be murder'rs and feel right at home from the state women's correction facilities. They may be lawless women just like my mother; I see them as my mother who need to be loved and they are adulterers; and It doesn't register; its the child in me that wants to love them so their is no adult view of problems. The problem is; I see them with innocence and they are anything but safe; they are the worst people in society. this is suicide for me; but I cant see it when im a child; the child won't allow me to see it; im back in grade school and I n need and want my mother.... I want to feel safe with my mother...
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Heres the point; I cant seem to see the difference in women. I think she's cute; she is attracted to me. Then what. I dont seem to feel anything is wrong when I see she is a gangster thug criminal; bad one. Im not stupid. im starting to wake up and wonder what im doing. I have a real pathological situation of new standards at all when it comes to women; just who connects with me for love; nothing else; it doesn't work because the girls have no values or standards; nothing. absolutely nothing... and im wondering why problems are arising and I never take them out.
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I need help with this one; this is crazy. I cant seem to see the difference between a female Doctor or professional and a thug murder'r from the jails if they are both nice to me at first.
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So; Im crazy and need help.
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OK; So; the standard level I need is high or much higher concerning women; culturally speaking; refinement; humanities; decency; laws; that kind of thing; I cant see the difference between an educated women with higher level standards and ethics and a murdering criminal women; psychopath. And that is where im pathological and have to wake up.