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Consumer 6
Consumer 6
Posts: 1036
Joined: Tue Nov 15, 2011 5:06 am
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- November 2020
emotions starting to bleed out; This is good
   Thu Nov 26, 2020 7:11 pm
Anxiety and dealing with the opposite sex
   Wed Nov 25, 2020 7:52 am
The work is over my head; but thats OK
   Wed Nov 18, 2020 8:35 am
Wont let the people I love into my life...
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Social and feeling worthy
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Loving myself for real
   Fri Nov 13, 2020 5:15 pm
Moving onward
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And her vision keeps getting closer
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On moving on and creating a new life
   Sun Nov 08, 2020 9:53 pm
Breaking the dating barrier
   Sat Nov 07, 2020 6:22 pm
Back to the drawing board with women
   Thu Nov 05, 2020 2:53 am
Changes are occurring; still isolated and lonely
   Tue Nov 03, 2020 6:13 am

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Not having it going on in the teenage years

Permanent Linkby OMNICELL on Sun Nov 23, 2014 11:51 pm

I tried to be popular! I was coming from a broken abrupt destroyed home! and, I did not know it! it was broken up on purpose, there was no real need for it to happen! The house owners both went there own way against the children, or leaving the children! both abandon the family system blaming the other! kids were caught in the middle and destroyed! the adults simply wanted the events of a family system to disappear! they had there fun! in a sense, they took the children they used back to the rental store and left, and never returned!

Adolf Hitler made the same decision as my parents! He made the decision to allow his generals to go ahead with decisions to kill excess children within villages, after slaughtering there parents! The general would have the children rounded up, taken to a field and murdered! then buried! sicking! it was all fee choice! he was a murderer! the people I came from were murders murders of children! very closely related to the same nature of Adolf Hitler!

Teenage years!;; I wanted to be popular! I needed the attention! I had no base! I was living with a family, I thought was a family! I was not wanted there! I was not wanted! sociopaths and I do not get along! I did not get along with them, when I found out they never wanted me!, and this was a new family system in a new place, far away from my home town! '

Home Town! I never really had a home or a home town! I never really had anything! or came from anything or anyone! Now they are all gone. I was mad because children should receive from there father or mother! I received nothing; I was gypped out of inheritance! but they were sociopaths! I had no idea when early on! I know now! but being gypped backfired on them; they were not with God! God created a situation that made it impossible for me to take any interest in them once I started getting better! They had nothing on me! they had nothing; no reason for me to go back! the troff was empty! So, like a spiders hole of blackness, I had no reason to stay! I slipped away and never came back!

Im now learning how to heal with in the recovery process!

I have allot of healing to do! I have God and no past family system!! At some point I get stronger and am able to move on!

Women; I had dissociative disorder and have not been able to have girl friends! I could not get near anyone and I was to mentally to be close to people; Impossible!

Now things have changes, specifically in the last year! specifically in the last 6 months! specifically in the last 60 day!

Started working on Dating tapes ( Double your dating!) started this 5 years ago!, Im now applying things! IVe been applying things; one piece at a time, grooming, how to attract! how to work a room and look like an alpha male! how to approach, openers, story telling, building her her up, creating safety and comfort!, keno escalation, more build up, she's now proving herself to me! therefore, its only logical that she give me her phone number when I ask her for it! ( put your phone number down, Ill take out)!@

All of this building confidence! And Ive practiced the basics; saying hello to people! and studying more approach stuff; openers for conversations!

Well, today saw another break through! its been only recently that IVe been hitting on girls that I really thought were hot! And today one of those girls, I opened up on! told her what I really thought! in response to sat down next to me, and we began joking with each other! I got up and went out side, she follow me! we talked about sex and relationship stuff! and looks, and other porn and other stuff! It was the interactions that were so important! and that she is good looking! and Ive fantasized about her plenty! She's with someone! but wants something else! I wont do relationship people; you have to be single!

She asked me a funny question; she asked if I online date! I told her no! I don't need to! When Im ready, I know who to make things happen in groups of people 50 or more or less! and I will walk up and create attraction and ask real people out! I thought it was interesting!

Allot of really good looking girls are taken! its hard! they might think Im cute! and stare at me, but they are with someone else, and this can be very frustrating!

Anyway, opening up on her with confidence was not possible before, I was 2 intimidated! but now I can! or Ive done it this once with this beautiful girl! she wants to read my blogs!

Activities; Ill go with Singer song writer! I would love to talk to God and work through what ever it would take to have a place to be a singer song writer; a practice space! that would be great!

Dissociative Disorder
AVPD; Social avoidance
Previous/Psychotic clinical Depression
obsessive/compulsive disorder
Evolution didn't stop my death, God did .....Now what?
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