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OMNICELL
Consumer 6
Consumer 6
 
Posts: 1035
Joined: Tue Nov 15, 2011 5:06 am
Blog: View Blog (943)
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- July 2019
Im beginning to understand
   Sun Jul 14, 2019 3:30 pm
Visualizing
   Fri Jul 12, 2019 8:28 pm
Starting from the beginning
   Fri Jul 12, 2019 3:35 pm
The trap house part 2
   Fri Jul 12, 2019 3:13 pm
The trap house; I only knew about; In the end I win
   Fri Jul 12, 2019 1:15 am
Massive Mega paradigm shift
   Thu Jul 11, 2019 3:01 pm
First post recovery conversation
   Wed Jul 10, 2019 9:55 pm
Dating and Art
   Wed Jul 10, 2019 4:44 pm
movement
   Tue Jul 09, 2019 5:56 pm
childhood abandonment
   Mon Jul 08, 2019 3:23 pm
Being single
   Mon Jul 08, 2019 3:53 am
Preview: PTSD; High School
   Sat Jul 06, 2019 10:31 pm
Fear
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Ive found some answers
   Sat Jul 06, 2019 12:41 pm
D.I.D; let me introduce myself
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PTSD; dealing with triggers.
   Fri Jul 05, 2019 5:32 am
Making me into a loser; its all about the critical voice
   Thu Jul 04, 2019 6:08 pm
Molding sound like clay; having reasons; Things are changing
   Wed Jul 03, 2019 4:25 pm
critical voice
   Wed Jul 03, 2019 6:38 am
Toxic shame
   Tue Jul 02, 2019 11:05 pm
Ive found some answers
   Tue Jul 02, 2019 7:59 am

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moving forward with Asian-soulmate

Permanent Linkby OMNICELL on Mon Aug 06, 2018 7:57 pm

moving forward with Asian-soulmate; putting the peaces together.
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I lost 30 pounds! I did it using the laws of attraction and a bicycle! Lots of work on that one; 2 months of riding! 4 months before this to get back at shape in the gym!
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Art; this is a major manifestation! Ive had small minor manifestations, major/miner manifestations! And then it was time for major manifestations; Ive been working on those for about a year!
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To the present! I have 4 types of manifestations; Relationships; occupation/vocation/ and Things/places and money!
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The first major manifestations to break open is Occupation; art. It matters not what the breakthrough is from; what sub title; whats important; its been broken through and its major! Art is the first to break through!
Ive been working on relationships! and much has been improved; However, the main goal of relationships is; Asian-soulmate; this has not been broken through; and at times, seems a million miles away! However, I have to keep at it until it breaks through; it breaks through in the mind first!
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With art; my mind got fed up and while screaming my lungs out concerning the 2 sides of my personality; one would allow me to think about being an artist; the other would not; it finally broke! My mind reorganized itself; it broke through; it broke down all the negative unwanted thoughts coming into my mind that were blocking me; it blocked them all and I decided; Im going to make art; and for the first time since childhood; my mind was without resistance and I began to make art work with no resistance; this means; I could because a professional artist if I wanted to.
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Im looking break through with Asian-soulmate! And I have to remember; no one owes me anything!
The problem with Asian-soulmate; I have women around me that are Asian-beautiful! But I cant or dont trust them! They are not coming forward to share themselves with me! It feels more manipulative! Their are more then one Asian girl in the world; so I move on and allow the universe to fill in the gaps until another women is brought!
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I have problems walking up and talking to new people! its very very hard; Im very bashful. My background is not something Im proud of; its something I fear! I dont have another identity to show people; only the one from the past that is trying to heal! I dont think its every enough! No work; economics shot! Im not sure what to share with people or who would be interested in me1
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I have to believe; thats the problem; thats what Ill be working on!
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Im working with the universe to get me to new places; higher ground of more quality people that I meet some of them an date them! We will see!
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The face of social is upon me! Im a bit freaked out with the social requirements! I dont like this at all!

Dissociative Disorder
CPTSD
AVPD; Social avoidance
Previous/Psychotic clinical Depression
agoraphobia
obsessive/compulsive disorder
Evolution didn't stop my death, God did .....Now what?
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