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https://www.psychforums.com/blog/OMNICELL/looking_to_bust_through_dissociative_order_b-12168_sid-0a876486ad8a33e6ba327a2e725acde5.html |
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| Author: | OMNICELL [ Tue Jun 12, 2018 4:22 pm ] |
| Blog Subject: | Looking to bust through dissociative order |
Im talking more about what happened to me when young in groups; but its not enough to talk to women; Im still scared; I need the right women round me. I will ask God to bring the right people around me so I feel safe! I need nurturing women figures around me! Im not sure where to find them; I have to ask God to bring some to me! align with me on it! I need to use them as segregate mothers; so I can feel loved again! . Im trying to work through the past! Its hard facing things that shut me down emotionally and mentally! . I was thrown away when way to young to be able to deal with it! it shocked me and I never saw it coming; and that was the thrill and creation of the sociopaths; to use children then throw them away! . Here I am; trying to let go of dis connection with the world; but Im not in the right environment to re connect! its to much for me! I have to work with God to be at the right places for connection again! . I must grow again before I can have girlfriends; I have to get back the ability to be emotional again! to feel again and be present again! I must be these things to be with the right women and not the wrong ones! Something like that! . Im working on positive feelings! and positive feelings toward women! its hard; very hard; I feel like Im going to be judged no matter what I do! . I have to have a positie out look on things! This is so very hard! its crazy! . Im trying to get a hold of my thinking and send it in a direction that I want! It seems truly hard; Im working on it! . Im afraid of being laughed at by women! Im not sure where this came from; I have an idea its from my teenage years and before where their was no development! . I need new people to associate with! . I need better women associate with! Women that see my value! . My goal is to face the losses of my childhood; accept them and what happened and move on! The problem is dissociation! |
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