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OMNICELL
Consumer 6
Consumer 6
 
Posts: 1036
Joined: Tue Nov 15, 2011 5:06 am
Blog: View Blog (1108)
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- November 2020
Anxiety and dealing with the opposite sex
   Wed Nov 25, 2020 7:52 am
The work is over my head; but thats OK
   Wed Nov 18, 2020 8:35 am
Wont let the people I love into my life...
   Tue Nov 17, 2020 5:45 am
Social and feeling worthy
   Mon Nov 16, 2020 4:21 pm
Loving myself for real
   Fri Nov 13, 2020 5:15 pm
Moving onward
   Fri Nov 13, 2020 1:29 pm
And her vision keeps getting closer
   Wed Nov 11, 2020 11:19 am
On moving on and creating a new life
   Sun Nov 08, 2020 9:53 pm
Breaking the dating barrier
   Sat Nov 07, 2020 6:22 pm
Back to the drawing board with women
   Thu Nov 05, 2020 2:53 am
Changes are occurring; still isolated and lonely
   Tue Nov 03, 2020 6:13 am

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Looking to bust through dissociative order

Permanent Linkby OMNICELL on Tue Jun 12, 2018 4:22 pm

Im talking more about what happened to me when young in groups; but its not enough to talk to women; Im still scared; I need the right women round me. I will ask God to bring the right people around me so I feel safe! I need nurturing women figures around me! Im not sure where to find them; I have to ask God to bring some to me! align with me on it! I need to use them as segregate mothers; so I can feel loved again!
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Im trying to work through the past! Its hard facing things that shut me down emotionally and mentally!
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I was thrown away when way to young to be able to deal with it! it shocked me and I never saw it coming; and that was the thrill and creation of the sociopaths; to use children then throw them away!
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Here I am; trying to let go of dis connection with the world; but Im not in the right environment to re connect! its to much for me! I have to work with God to be at the right places for connection again!
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I must grow again before I can have girlfriends; I have to get back the ability to be emotional again! to feel again and be present again! I must be these things to be with the right women and not the wrong ones! Something like that!
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Im working on positive feelings! and positive feelings toward women! its hard; very hard; I feel like Im going to be judged no matter what I do!
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I have to have a positie out look on things! This is so very hard! its crazy!
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Im trying to get a hold of my thinking and send it in a direction that I want! It seems truly hard; Im working on it!
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Im afraid of being laughed at by women! Im not sure where this came from; I have an idea its from my teenage years and before where their was no development!
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I need new people to associate with!
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I need better women associate with! Women that see my value!
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My goal is to face the losses of my childhood; accept them and what happened and move on! The problem is dissociation!

Dissociative Disorder
CPTSD
AVPD; Social avoidance
Previous/Psychotic clinical Depression
agoraphobia
obsessive/compulsive disorder
Evolution didn't stop my death, God did .....Now what?
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