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OMNICELL
Consumer 6
Consumer 6
 
Posts: 1029
Joined: Tue Nov 15, 2011 5:06 am
Blog: View Blog (871)
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- May 2019
Thinking about moving
   Thu May 23, 2019 9:49 pm
PTSD and breaking through?
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i have alot more to talk about
   Sat May 18, 2019 11:49 pm
I cant remember sex
   Sat May 18, 2019 4:32 am
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   Fri May 17, 2019 6:01 am
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   Thu May 16, 2019 8:36 pm
In limbo land
   Wed May 15, 2019 3:32 am
Getting fat and other things
   Mon May 13, 2019 6:14 am
Childhood horror starting to surface
   Sat May 11, 2019 12:00 am
blessings; this is stating for me; to feel blessed
   Thu May 09, 2019 7:41 pm
resentments and negative thinking
   Thu May 09, 2019 5:43 pm
Im working on stories
   Wed May 08, 2019 8:32 pm
Dissociative people write blogs
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Coming back; no friends
   Mon May 06, 2019 3:50 am

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Lonely recovery!

Permanent Linkby OMNICELL on Tue Oct 27, 2015 3:55 am

I go to many places for group recovery! Some are good; some are tough! They all help!

The chemical based meetings; drug addict meetings are great fro some things; not so great when the click thugs take over the group and think they own the place! ###$ everything up! Makes no difference! I will still go! They are arrogant and rude as if they own the place and give orders to others!
I don't care! I go and share!

Im slowly heading toward my lonely goal! The goal is to have my life back; but without the original players when young! Its as if they all died! They area arrogant and evil! And they turned on me and abandon me long ago! All of them! Including the most important ones!

No matter! I will continue down my path! Most of the people that abandon me were worthless! But you would have never known! They had money but no conscious! Nothing! No remorse! Nothing!

If I would have know what they are I would have never gotten invoked with them in the first place!

They are demonic!

=============================================================================

I go it alone! Thats how it feels! Im getting stronger or better; I just am! Stronger! I put the work out and get stronger! Slowly!

I have to put the sward in the fire to get it stronger! And I am and have been and will continue to do so!
It is brutal humiliating work! I sacrifice my identity and allow others to think Im weaker then I am! It allows me to follow through and stay in the meetings and stay out of trouble!

It gets to me; being around punks with big mouths! I simply wait it out!

The recovery process is saving my life! I have to keep working at it!

Dissociative Disorder
CPTSD
AVPD; Social avoidance
Previous/clinical Depression
lighter forms of agoraphobia
Evolution didn't stop my death, God did .....Now what?
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