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OMNICELL
Consumer 6
Consumer 6
 
Posts: 1035
Joined: Tue Nov 15, 2011 5:06 am
Blog: View Blog (1009)
Archives
- August 2019
Finding my voice
   Tue Aug 20, 2019 4:47 pm
Three important conversations with women
   Tue Aug 20, 2019 1:39 am
I letting socioapths attack me again; abuse me; feel demoralized
   Mon Aug 19, 2019 11:23 am
Mellowing; and idea of exploring the entrances to the gap...
   Mon Aug 19, 2019 1:20 am
A house and a backyard and 4 walls and a hobby
   Sun Aug 18, 2019 1:09 am
moving into know mans land (positive); and then through
   Fri Aug 16, 2019 9:41 pm
The Gap
   Wed Aug 14, 2019 8:37 pm
Teenage years
   Wed Aug 14, 2019 2:25 am
finding and painting rocks
   Tue Aug 13, 2019 5:14 pm
Expressing my feelings
   Tue Aug 13, 2019 3:26 pm
I know Ive never met any women to date ever....
   Tue Aug 13, 2019 11:02 am
Being alone all of my life with out women or a relationship
   Tue Aug 13, 2019 10:16 am
The wright brothers created plaines; Im creating my new life
   Tue Aug 13, 2019 8:41 am
A new era is starting; But Ive got problems
   Mon Aug 12, 2019 12:19 pm
Signs of the end is here; and a new era starting
   Sun Aug 11, 2019 6:13 pm
Trapped between 2 worlds
   Sun Aug 11, 2019 3:23 pm
Things are getting better; Im still fat; I got a problem
   Fri Aug 09, 2019 11:38 pm
Women have defeated me? and I feel deated? #1
   Fri Aug 09, 2019 6:45 am
Plans from the universe; they have cometh
   Wed Aug 07, 2019 4:39 pm
breaking things and coming together
   Wed Aug 07, 2019 11:44 am
What am I thinking about
   Wed Aug 07, 2019 4:16 am
That breaking point
   Tue Aug 06, 2019 8:45 pm
Needing my mothers permission
   Tue Aug 06, 2019 5:47 pm
And another day
   Tue Aug 06, 2019 5:03 pm
Im so right in the middle of the promises
   Tue Aug 06, 2019 4:35 pm
whats missing with music; live playing
   Mon Aug 05, 2019 11:22 pm
Women and John Denver
   Sun Aug 04, 2019 11:33 pm
Bulling
   Sun Aug 04, 2019 1:33 am
art images coming back and other things; taking action
   Sat Aug 03, 2019 8:35 pm
I wasn't suppose to break the my first girls heart....
   Sat Aug 03, 2019 12:47 pm
Take my mother out of the picture; what do I get.
   Fri Aug 02, 2019 11:47 pm
Where am at right now.
   Thu Aug 01, 2019 11:30 am

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Its an inside job

Permanent Linkby OMNICELL on Tue Sep 12, 2017 10:32 am

Women; Dealing with women; I don't know! I need or want better quality people; its that simple! I guess one could say more mature; but thats not it; more sophisticated!
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I was thrown away when young; now, the goal is to face source energy and recover! and this means recovery in every and all areas; including education, talents, security, success, relationships; dreams; everything! spirituality! where I live and how I feel on a daily basis, who I know! everything! who I hang with! Friend life, sex life!
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Sex life was destroyed! Now, slowly things have turned around a bit; meaning, with the laws of attraction, Ive attracted some people that I was attracted 2!
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most of the people Im around are not the right ones for sex! They don't want sex, they want another dream man to marry and take care of their kids; Im not interested; no thanks! Im not their father and she's not my wife; so back off!
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I need better quality people around me!
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Trusting God is the most important issue; the unfolding of my life here on earth! This is a hard one; lots of memories I would rather forget! I was exploited completely as a child; nothing I can do about it! The scum that did were scum!
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Trust in a higher power and go in the right directions!
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I have talents; haven't done me any good! cant get in touch with them; I haven't been in situations of decency enough to use them!
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Im slowly allowing God to make things happen and take me back into art and expressional areas! nothing easy about this! Im like; " again"! What type of disappointments am I going to be in this time!
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I have to work with God and trust! the trust is the most important thing Im working with God! The child in me does not need more broken promise to a God that never delivered! What good was it to be destroyed on earth in my own country by my own people; what good was this!
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Im attempting to open up and take chances opening up! So, Im working with God on this experiment! The point is; its about God; God first! God is the front man; I send him the info, he is my protector; I send the info of what I want from my life on earth and he takes car of the rest!
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I was humiliated and demoralized when young! used; and something should be done about it! meaning, from God! I have to learn how to work with God! God and trust and the focus on working with God and not working about the outcome!
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Its all very confusing working with God! the unfolding of pathways! Why wont God just bring me what i want! Whats the purpose of all these games; for what! why! Why would the universe need to play all these games! why! Im sure my feelings have been explicit about what I want! I dont get it! I have to change from someone that feels like Im missing something to someone who believes its coming! its about belief, and I have to take this to God!

Dissociative Disorder
CPTSD
AVPD; Social avoidance
Previous/Psychotic clinical Depression
agoraphobia
obsessive/compulsive disorder
Evolution didn't stop my death, God did .....Now what?
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