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OMNICELL
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Consumer 6
 
Posts: 1035
Joined: Tue Nov 15, 2011 5:06 am
Blog: View Blog (1025)
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- November 2019
Social skills improving
   Thu Nov 07, 2019 12:51 am
My goal is to work through adolescence.
   Fri Nov 01, 2019 9:16 pm

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Im working on stories

Permanent Linkby OMNICELL on Wed May 08, 2019 8:32 pm

Im working on stories concerning my future; what I want to be or be like or own when I grow up; who I want to marry; everything; every story I can come up with; O my! Its not easy; but one starts at the beginning and with time I can do well at it; not in the beginning; its treacherous; I hit my walls that stop me in life; virtual walls inside my head. they stop my writing; so; I allow more stories to be written and I keep at it; slowly painfully breaking things down; breaking walls down. Also, visualizing what I want; focusing in on what I want; that is the fasted way to get what I want; to find the path of least resistance is to focus in my mind of what I want; for long periods all day long. And this is my great goal; to train my mind to be an expert at focusing on what I want; watching it grow in my head.
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So; its working; but its a “man-up"; meaning; anyone that participates in this kind of things; you got to man up; this is long term and its lonely work and painful; and Im out on a limb most of the time; it hurts; its sorrowful and everything that goes with it; but it must be done; and its working; working to break down the barriers of the past.
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Its not easy; its hard earned. I keep at it;
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I love knowing Im not holding anyone else responsible for the way my life unfolds. And their it is; and its all about practice.
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What unfolds; not only the dream I want but how to get it.
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Heres an example;
What does it take to loose weight; it takes practice exercising; I have to learn to write stories about weight loss that motivate me as if Im already thin. Hours and hours of exercise. Hundreds of hours; 300 to 400 hours of exercise for some; and thats the way it works; B_tch about it; who the ###$ cares; the fat on my gut dont care; It will only come off when I loose more calories then I take in; and how is that done; exercise. Ive been on several weight loss excursions; motivation to build momentum; 100 hours to get in shape; and then it starts; another 300 hours to loose the weight; How long will it take; its up to me; how long do I want to weight before putting in those 300 hours; and food changes start occurring; sugar is eliminated and the amount I eat is eliminated; and the foods I eat are purposely slow digesting; meaning Im not hungry most of the day; and I learn to drink water and eat soups when Im eating; fills my gut up and flips the cut off switch in my nervous system; telling my brain Im full.
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$#%^ takes work; noth’ns free baby.
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Not everyone is on my side; when one sees me climbing out of the box; they want to pull me back in; slots of work to continue until I get past the point of other crabs trying to pull me back into the boiling crab sauté pan with lid; This crabs knocked that lid off and is getting out; Im going somewhere in life; I dont care about the losers left behind; bye bye losers.
Last edited by Snaga on Thu May 09, 2019 2:21 am, edited 1 time in total.
Reason: Swear filter

Dissociative Disorder
CPTSD
AVPD; Social avoidance
Previous/Psychotic clinical Depression
agoraphobia
obsessive/compulsive disorder
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