Our partner

User avatar
Consumer 6
Consumer 6
Posts: 1031
Joined: Tue Nov 15, 2011 5:06 am
Blog: View Blog (901)
- June 2019
   Mon Jun 17, 2019 10:32 pm
intimacy 2
   Mon Jun 17, 2019 4:02 pm
   Mon Jun 17, 2019 10:51 am
Identity overwhelmed
   Sun Jun 16, 2019 10:22 am
re changing the present
   Wed Jun 12, 2019 3:45 pm
Working out of it; the struggle continues
   Tue Jun 11, 2019 4:14 pm
A new segment of life
   Tue Jun 11, 2019 1:07 am
dealing with life from zero to 18
   Mon Jun 10, 2019 8:13 pm
Connecting to things in the real world
   Mon Jun 10, 2019 11:53 am
Things are changing
   Mon Jun 10, 2019 4:43 am
I have to believe more
   Sat Jun 08, 2019 10:24 pm
liking myself and dating
   Thu Jun 06, 2019 8:46 pm
   Thu Jun 06, 2019 4:58 pm
   Tue Jun 04, 2019 11:05 pm
   Tue Jun 04, 2019 7:27 pm
   Tue Jun 04, 2019 11:04 am
bulling and meditation and connection and...
   Sun Jun 02, 2019 8:03 pm
Bulling and meditation and connection and...
   Sun Jun 02, 2019 5:57 am
Childhood reconnection;
   Sat Jun 01, 2019 4:26 pm

+ May 2019
+ April 2019
+ March 2019
+ February 2019
+ January 2019
+ December 2018
+ November 2018
+ October 2018
+ September 2018
+ August 2018
+ July 2018
+ June 2018
+ May 2018
+ April 2018
+ March 2018
+ February 2018
+ January 2018
+ December 2017
+ November 2017
+ October 2017
+ September 2017
+ August 2017
+ July 2017
+ June 2017
+ May 2017
+ April 2017
+ March 2017
+ February 2017
+ January 2017
+ December 2016
+ November 2016
+ September 2016
+ August 2016
+ July 2016
+ June 2016
+ May 2016
+ April 2016
+ March 2016
+ February 2016
+ January 2016
+ December 2015
+ November 2015
+ October 2015
+ September 2015
+ August 2015
+ April 2015
+ March 2015
+ February 2015
+ January 2015
+ December 2014
+ November 2014
+ October 2014
+ September 2014
+ August 2014
+ July 2014
+ June 2014
+ May 2014
+ April 2014
+ March 2014
+ February 2014
+ January 2014
+ December 2013
+ November 2013
+ October 2013
+ September 2013
+ August 2013
+ July 2013
+ June 2013
+ May 2013
+ April 2013
+ March 2013
+ February 2013
+ January 2013
+ December 2012
+ November 2012
+ October 2012
+ September 2012
+ August 2012
+ July 2012
+ June 2012
+ May 2012
+ April 2012
+ March 2012
+ February 2012
+ January 2012
+ December 2011
+ November 2011
Search Blogs

Im ready to fall in love with someone

Permanent Linkby OMNICELL on Mon May 14, 2018 12:33 am

Im ready to fall in love with someone! Im falling in love with myself; Im doing really good! ITs hard; I remember what things were like! Now; I must remember; those are PTSD memories and they are a lie; the bad stuff! I did not do that to myself! I was underage and someone put me in un-compromise positions! So, I have to give myself a break!
Im ready to fall in love with someone. However, I align with the grid, the vortex and source first! My focus is on the vortex and my manifestations in the vortex! She is coming from the vortex; so, I concentrate on whats in the vortex and wait for her to step out of it! source energy directs me; the grid fills it out like paper work; what Is to happen; what Im feeling about it; and want to happen!
Problems; jumping the gun!
Im dissociative and think all the time of whats going on outside of me; and I'm feeling what I think of what I see, all the time! I think the other person must know how I feel! they must; Im open with my feeling within my mind and brain; its open! In reality, its not open to the outside world; they know nothing; In reality; its outside my mind; but still in my brain; floating around behind my eyes!
At times; I think others know how I feel! If I see a women I like and Ive been thinking about her for a long time; its as if a relationship with her has actually been growing; so, when I see her and ask her out; I act like we she be moving forward since I've been working her out in my mind; then Im stunned when I find out she does not know anything about me or how I feel! I have to slowly back track and show her each feelings as if Ive never thought about it and its bran new! and Ive done this a bit!
With women; its who them or they will have no clue; they are not mind readers! and this is especially tuff on me!
Im learning that I have to make a commitment with a women; meaning, I have to have a committed relationship concept before I get involved or a relationship will never work!
Im horrified of having relationships with the wrong people; and Im more scared of having relationships with the right people; because; the right people turn out to be the wrong people! However, in reality, Im talking about situations when I was younger and had no control over things! I was forced or stuck around the wrong predators!
So, no matter what direction I take with relationships; Im taking a chance; Im taking a chance to get started again! I either do or I dont!
Its all so new to me; its been so very long since the last time I actually loved someone enough to want to go after them!
I fell in love with them after chasing them; I chased them because they were the right natural person to chase and feel something for!
Strike three; your out! I dont play games with the wrong women; I test, I watch! I listen! If your interested in me and not responding; I will question the situation; If I feel manipulation is hovering; Strike one! I look up to the universe and expect an answer, and I ply a question; "why universe" " whats with this girl you sent me" " she's flaking out on me" " what gives?" Strike one against the universe! For the universe sent her and something is not matching up! Any strikes beyond this means its over! Ive never had a women I stuck twice on that did not soon get three strikes your out! " Universe, she's struck out; bring another one please" " can you make it work this time?".

I want women sent from the universe and no others; and I get confused at times or mistake certain women for universe women! And when I realize Ive made a mistake; I kindly and humbly admit that I made a mistake looking at this women with interest; and I quietly back out the way I came with my hate laid low, then, when near out of side; I turn down a new road and begin to walk; and I dont stop walking until the universe brings me another women!
I have to make a lot of changes to have the kind of women I want to attract! And this is humbling!
When I rise to the frequency of what Im looking for; she will come!

Dissociative Disorder
AVPD; Social avoidance
Previous/Psychotic clinical Depression
obsessive/compulsive disorder
Evolution didn't stop my death, God did .....Now what?
0 Comments Viewed 661 times

Who is online

Registered users: 123paulius, AProphet, Bing [Bot], birdsong87, Brandon1, DuckToTheFace, Exabot [Bot], Flowergirl97, GadSitar, Google [Bot], Google Adsense [Bot], Google Feedfetcher, ItsJustUs, justonemoreperson, KingsleyHere, Lumelora, MakersDozn, Muninn, TeddyBear the helper, thelivinghell92, traced