Im beginning to memorize again; this is what is needed in school to succeed...
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Im not in normal school right now... Or am I. Im in that learning mode. So; Im working on things...
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Im doing more than learning on things. Im studying music; this time to perform. In order to perform I have to memorize; and Im learning how right now.
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Half able to feel part of things again... How do I say this? Im in a lot of 12 step meetings and feeling better about it.
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Im feeling like Im more part of a family system; Never thought that would ever happen again never. IT means Im getting my childhood memories back; Im remembering when I felt safe as a child for a few years; My memories; and the independence I felt and thought; and its transferring from then to now...
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In the near past; I could not be in a house or a neighborhood ever again.
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Im starting to feel half way a part of things...
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Im not sure; I Was at a meeting tonight and someone said their life was a Lot Lot better and they give the credit to God; It wasn't them; they just followed God.
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So; Im starting to memorize. and its been 50 years.
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The last time I remember processing anything was during a time period of this movie; Bless he beasts and he children. Or; that was the song.... Or; The bed wetters; that may have been the movie...
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Perfect; and their It is; Alive again in my mind; and the reason; because Im coming up to speed; up to that time period; yes; Im not fully their yet; meaning; here; but dam. Im getting their. all worth it. That was the last time I processed my feelings and felt powerful in my personal life; not under terror.... terror had not happened yet. But it will very soon after this; and I had no idea it was coming. Now; Im coming back. And I loved this movie and it was my time; just like young people today; it is your time.. same thing.
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Bless the Beasts and Children is a 1971 film adaptation of the novel of the same name written ... The designation "Bedwetters" applies especially well to Gerald Goodenow, the sixth member of the group, who often wets the bed at night – a ...
Release date: June 1971 (West Germany); This was a film about the young people and how they felt vs the older generation. My generation was. " We are the young generation; and we've got something to say"..... 1963 to about 1972.... I was born in 62... So; I was right in the middle of it....
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So; Things are picking up for me; Im still not present. But Im slowly participating in life again; taking chances to begin small things that are building my life... Im not so detached as before... Im starting to wake up again. But its more then wake up.... Im starting to live again and feel again; but in a kind of controlled therapeutic way; Im still in the hospital; if you will; Im not able to handle the outside world yet; but Im getting closer; more confidence; it will happen. But its slow work when one has been destroyed.