Things are getting better! or different or Im heading on a path to living again! Im interacting with people again, Ive changed apartments, this one is more secure and better; Ive got a way of practicing drums in my apartment! and Im now using cell phones instead of lan lines! everything is changing! The next steps! more social; Asian-soulmate girlfriend and truck! Those are the other 2 areas Im interested in! Im always working success based stuff!
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I take action but need help! My dissociative disorder leaves me disabled; much like Im autistic; especially when interacting with things; things like new cell phones! That part of my mind that interacts has been ripped to pieces; it does not respond anymore, I simply dissociate if its out in the open to long.
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I needed someone to help set up my first cell phone! and my friend did this! He's much faster with things then I am; Im smart but when it comes to outside interactions; Im retarded! Im so slow; I have to learn to ask others for help! and thats part of why Im succeeding! I am having success!
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I saw this relative today! I guess he didnt get it! I dont want anything to do with him or the memories associated with his family or any other group like him! These upper middle class folks just dont get it; 2 much money! they either get what they want or they put their heads in the air and squeal of; thats what happened to me! I got dumped again! wasn't 2 bad! He didnt like the fact I was on SSI! I guess its below his status belt! I was on bike and he and his wife in car! They never get it! they judge you to death to your face and then you tell them the truth with no fear and their gone! I guess Im not the kind of guy you invite to your home; so sorry! God likes me! So does Santa Clause!
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SO, Im learning much about allot of things! Im opening up more at meetings about women and the trouble Ive had with them'; how my condition has effect my abilities to have relationships!
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My goal is to have more goals; and more desires and watch them develop and come about!