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OMNICELL
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hating women

Permanent Linkby OMNICELL on Sat Jun 04, 2016 11:47 am

Sounds like a bad subject! " hating women"! But the subject header is not what it seems! the problem! The real concern is that Im alone! Meaning, I don't have, nor have I had a group of men to turn to work this stuff out with! So, it about the frustration of dealing with the problematic issues dealing with women!

Its Horribly frustrating! But men work this stuff out with other men; not with women! One of the name numbing problems is money or social position! I have neither; but Im worth more then most!

My value as a human being is high; and my life is not my fault! Im now starting to wake up; but none of it has any value to women; or the women Ive met! I have no value to women! never have!

Hero complex; I deserve the women at the end of the movie because Im the hero that has worked hard!

Yesterday, I met yet, another bitch! This never ends! Its about money! I didn't have any; Im on housing! Im an intelligent person; It's not my fault! Ive worked brutally to get better!

Men in my position seem to blame women for their problems! Probably out of desperation for some kind of sympathy!

Never getting a break; you want the hatred to stop! I mean, the hatred from women!

Most of the hate Im talking about is not " me hating women"! Its women hating me! Most of the " women hater; men hating women"! Is the opposite direction! They hate men like me! Im considered a weakling or worthless or a loser! Im none of these! But there is no money!

How does this stop! Im not sure!

Its about who you meet!

When your desperate like I am to be noticed by anyone; anyone that comes in contact with you is judged! If I meet a women somewhere; she is a clerk and treats me wrong; Im infuriated! She is the only women I meet! I have no other contact with anyone or anything social!

When I talk about social; I see my mothers face! So, her influence is or has been keeping me out of social development!@! I am scared to death! Because I had to deal with her control; I had to be controlled to survive!

Im not around nice women! Possibly, I have to continue to get over my past and find or be around nice women! But if they see no value in me; whats the point! I lost my interest in the human experience long ago! These people were to shallow! Now, I have to be around these shallow people to survive! Im of no importance to anyone; they don't have the character for it!

I have to work with God! As for women! Im not sure! Im mad! Im frustrated!

Im finding women that are good looking with no character! Then bitching because Im not appreciated! I know better! But I don't know who to associate with!

Im in a situation where I have no money, Im on housing, Im on SSI! Im an intelligent creative person that is trying to find my way back into life again!

When you look at me as a loser! What am I supposed to do! Where do I go! Im not apart of anything with anyone! I didn't ask for this!

I don't use drugs or alcohol! No one has ever cared about me as a person! I was thrown away from everything everywhere! No one asked any questions! I was just thrown away! Now Im expected to do what; resurface around the same worthless scumbags that through me away!

Im trying to make my way back to civilization! Socially there is nothing! I have to create am image of what I want in my mind; and Im doing this! I have to take chances with people!

As for women; I have to decide what Im looking for! Technically, I need nice women to be around! Ones that don't judge! It's the judging part that is beating me half to death! Im judged into the ground! Im tired of being judged by people; its all they do! Im never good enough no matter what I do!
Is it possible Im around the wrong people!

I would like to be around the right people! All of this is 2 much! Im almost 54 years old! How much longer is this going to go on!

Ive never been impressed with women! I wanted to; but they value thugs that give them babies! they don't care about values or right n wrong! They care about their female social circles and who they slept with! IVe been round many women who don't care what kind of man they are using as the father! this concerns me! it is wrong! a sociopath should not be used to father anyone! they do not love children nor care about a childs survival! Im not stupid! women are suppose to have children! and if no decent men are left for them; what is a women suppose to do; but I don't hear women talking this way! they don't see to care!


Ive talked to many men about women! Psychopaths; thats what most men call them; and they're not joking! Its kind of a sickening stunning thing to hear! It was not what I expected; that women have no conscious! But they seem to have no conscious; no right or wrong; Nothing! It makes me sick! its very confusing to me! and to be around them! They have no values! No questioning of values! no questioning of anything! no right or wrong! and no interest either way!

I don't like them; or being around them! They are manipulative and seem to have no conscious!

I do love being around women; but not the ones with no conscious!

Im of no value to them because I have no money! But God values me a great deal all the time!

I did nothing wrong! Im a decent respectable person! None of this makes any sense! Im in a society that has brushed me aside, over n over n over!

IVe attracted a million women when I was mentally waking up a few years ago! But I was never attracting the right women! And the right ones never saw any value in me! But Im full of value! Nothing makes any sense!

I think it better to say; most of the women Ive been around are looking for money as their value!

I as a person have not been valued! And it's concerning and scary! I don't like being around these kind of scumbags! I don't like them, or what they stand for! They are not my friends! They are not my family!

I understand that women have children and have to be protected and need money! I understand this! but I am spit upon as worthless! When I turn to God; even God sits stunned! God does not blame me for wanting to die! I would kill myself in a heartbeat and leave this place! but God seems to want me down here and alive; for what I don't know! Honestly, I don't! Im not allowed to be creative or myself down here! I don't understand any of this! I would much better kill myself and leave this place and never come back! Go back to God! and never remember I was here!

I am not sure socially! Im not sure! I guess I cant blame anyone! I don't know! Nothing makes any sense!

How can I expect anyone to take me seriously, they think Im a loser! But Im not a loser, and it's not my fault!

Would I like to date someone; I would; but who! I don't know! Its about the caste system where I live! Western societies have a caste system like India! Money is the name of the game!

Possibly, women have nothing to do with this; Im simply expecting them to take care of me and they're not!
So, Im randomly expecting women to take care of me!

By the time I get my life together, it will be to late! None of this seems fair to me! I don't know what to think! I will have to take this back to God!

The problem is; Im walking up to women expecting them to treat me with respect as if I'm someone with money when I don't have any! All of this is very hard!

Women have to be young; men have to have money! Its all so very simple!

If a man is good looking; he doesn't have to have anything! And this is where Ive fit in! But soon, because of my insecurities! This does not fly! As soon as someone finds out Ive got problems; Im done! No one is interested anymore!

Im trying to wake up, these people are not helping!

ITs hard to wake up! I have no support! I must turn to God! Not women!

Men make the mistake of turning to women to be taken care of! Much like the Hero in the movie!

If you have no money, you're not going to be taken care of by anyone! No one cares! If youve been thrown away in this life and cant get back on your feet; no one cares! If you die tomorrow! No one cares!

At least the men ive been around, understand that those who kill themselves are people who have been crucified by this society! But Ive found no women; no one that understand such things! Or very few!
Im sure on this site its different! But still! All of this is confusing!

Im attempting to wake up out of my dream world! And Im finding the world is not responding and does not care the way I want them to!

Turning to God is the answer and the laws of attraction! I have allot of work to do with LOA!

Life seems to hard a place! I never get to live it! Im always struggling for tomorrow to be better then today! I'm always struggling so tomorrow will be livable when today is not!

I get nothing out of this life; nothing but a useless struggle! I would kill myself, but who would care!

Ive been suicidal all my life! So, this should say something about me expecting others to randomly notice me and take care of me!

Possibly, the situation is a sad one and Im in a state of desperation and exhaustion! Im expecting women to take care of me; there are no women! What women am I talking about!

Im in the recovery process to stay alive so Im not suicidal anymore; or kill myself! God is keeping me alive so I don't kill myself; but I don't understand why! and Im not sure I want to stay alive! but I do! I do want to stay alive! but when I turn back out into the world! I get smashed to pieces and treated like Im worthless! The world seems to want to kill me!


I have to remember who I am and what Im doing! what am I doing here! God is trying to keep me alive! but why! I have nothing and am not able to be myself or express my feelings or talents! I have no relationships! no one is interested!

Women don't play a part in this because I have no women coming up to me taking any interest! I don't! I don't take an interest in them because I have no money! I am looked over or brushed off!

Im working with the laws of attraction to attract the right people! But the rest of the world does not see me as this big winner because Ive struggled! Most people don't know who I am! and they don't want to know!

Im a guy you see on a bike all the time! The women I have met are so shallow; the interest does not last long! Instead of getting mad at them; I have to remember; they are not the real people I am supposed to attract! When they find out I'm a " insecure loser"! Then its over with; they leave and Im alone again! This happens through body language!

Possibly Im mad that I do not have more social power to go with my intelligence! I was destroyed when young and do not have the privilege as of yet to be out of its grips! Im just beginning to deal with what happened to me!

I must say, I have not been around many women! I have and I havent! I am not impressed; but I wanted to be! women are not impressed with me; I have no money!

What Im writing about is the plite of the poor person! Im an untouchable! no one notices me!


I'm horrified! And its been this way all my life! Nothing has changed since I was a kid! I think from about the age of 11 or 12 or 13, women, or young women went from children into something horrifying in my opinion! A very ugly condition of self centeredness! Completely ungodly!

Many women Ive met are unGodly and don't care! Ive seen many women act Godly, but would not know what that meant! My main bitch with women is that they don't notice me! even around me they see no value! no decrement for value! its shocking and horrifying! I simply do not know what to make of it! how could someone marry such a person! its impossible!

So, ive talking about the women that should not be around me; but I have not talked about the women that should!

So, there is allot of negative here! I have to keep working to bring in the positive! Nothing is worse then wanting positive and attracting negative!

The women that have been round me pity me or feel sorry for me; or something like this; but they give no status to me because God has no value to them!

Most of the women Im around that don't like me or see any value; Im around these women out of loneliness and desperation! Why else would I be around these people! These are not people I trust or see me my worth or care to know me or see me for who I am! When they find out Im a decent person with problems; their Gone! Its like I have the plaque!

Im written of as a dumb ass or weakling! God does not write me off! These people do not honer God! Why then would I think they should!

Something is wrong on my end of things! Im not " in my life"! Im trying to get in my life! No one is helping! I must turn to God again!

I believe women get a bad deal because men feel that women in general owe them! Women should cater to them and take care of them! Yet, in reality! This is not so; There is no such thing as " women"! Its jut a bunch of individuals!

So,, it's frustrating! It like being noticed by 100 women that are married! They take an interest in you; but they are not available!

I guess Im looking for a wife! Someone to take care of me! Someone I can love! My best friend? is this really possible anymore!

I guess I'm hurting because the past cant come back! I blew it in the past, and it hurts; those glory days are over!

Im slowly learning how to come back to this reality! Its all very hard! I think someone should owe me at some point or notice me at some point but they don't!

I have to get better and be able to meet people!

Its very hard! Im not able to create; Im a creative person with no practice room; a place to create in! So I don't create; half my mind is shut off! Im a creative thinker with no place to compose anything! I have no private art space to work in! So I don't work in anything!

I wait upon God! Im using the laws of attraction to attempt to change things! God has brought me success based thinking courses and stuff like this to help! We will see!

I spend every day wanting to be a song writing with no place, no space! Day after day, I watch my talents die away! All of them! Month after month after month! I don't get it!

If God wanted me to stay alive; would he not supply me with a place that I can have the freedom to be myself! What else am I doing on this planet! I would be working at these things 18 hours a day!

As it is, I simply watch time go by and do nothing with my life! I simply don't understand! Im not happy! Im enraged! Look at my life! Im being held back from every angle! I know what I want to do; and cant do it! I don't have the money! So, I turn to God for help! And I get the Laws of attraction! And I will work at them! But how long do I wait until I can be myself! Until I can compose; I must have a private place to do so or no serious work will be done!

Im a singer; Im watching my voice die away; no practice! How can I be a singer if I cant practice! it's ######6 torture!

Women; and how can I go out with a women when I have no life! I would bitch about not having a practice room! Soon, thats all it would be about!

I do not see women wanting to help me; only if God told them to! Most women do not want to help me succeed! For this reason, I consider most of them worthless! Why would I want them in my life! They offer nothing! Only when money is invoked would it make any sense! If a man had money! Unless God brings the right people to me!


So, allot of what Ive written about is enough for a person to give up! I have no life! Im attempting to work with God to save this life! But what is this all for! What has it all been about! I have no happiness out of this! I would kill myself in a heartbeat! If it were any problems! I don't need this; any of it!~ I have nothing! What is the point!

And as I have mentioned; women seem to have no conscious! Nothing! Why would I want to be around them! I don't!

Women have had no interest in me! never! none of them! ever! none have ever seen me or valued me! Some have been physically attracted! that stops quickly when they realize Im a loner with problems! that Im not connected into anything social!

But I don't like looking at porn all the time! This makes no sense either!

Is this really what life is supposed to be like!

The women I think I would have a connection with are more educated and would never accept my poverty! I would be laughed at, and this is a hard thing to face! Possibly, this is where God is leading me! how demoralizing!

Ive been scared to be around ' better" quality women! I can be just as ripped apart by them as I an the others!

I am suppose to sweep women off their feet! but how is this possible! I have no money!

Dissociative Disorder
CPTSD
AVPD; Social avoidance
Previous/Psychotic clinical Depression
agoraphobia
obsessive/compulsive disorder
Evolution didn't stop my death, God did .....Now what?
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Comments

Re: hating women

Permanent Linkby Snaga on Sat Jun 04, 2016 8:17 pm

I believe there's someone for everyone, Omni. Just have to keep looking. And remember she may be in a bad way, too, and need you as much as you need her.
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Tell someone you love them today, because Life is short. But scream it at them in Klingon, because Life is also terrifying and confusing.

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