I guess hating women is looked at as a weakness! I always thought of it as being honest! I wonder how God sees it!
I was called a women hater tonight in a meeting! It was a 12 step birthday! Meaning, a birthday at a 12 step recovery group!
I stem all hate toward women back to my mother! And thats a big load to take on for myself!
She involved herself in my personal life and then destroyed it! Or tried to destroy it!
The person who said this was looking for status with her other girlfriends! Nice people!
I go to these meetings for help! Not to be emasculated! But you have to learn where your at! You get what you take chances to get! Sometimes when you roll the dice, it comes up backwards!
At these meetings; it takes only a few weeks for the women to loose respect for me; the other women tell them things about me!
Don't touch him
He hates women!
He's a weakling nicey nice guy! " he's such a good guy"!
I refused to bang married women or those using dope! And Im not into deceptive women; so?
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Mother;
I have a definite problem with my mother! Getting over her and not hating other women for it! I do hate women! I hate all of them for what I saw them do! How I saw them treat my countryman!
They had no respect for my people; nothing!
I think they are evil! No conscious!
They don't seem to value that Im an honest man! So ###$ all of them!
Back to my MOTHER;
The work I must do with my mother is over the top!
I don't know where to start! And its triggered back onto regular!
How I had to deal with my mother was horrible l;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;
My mother had to take care of me; I could not function on my own! To much PTSD problems!
I resented being around her! I hated her and I hated it! Fear; I had been sold down the river from way back! I did not want to be around these people any longer! They were attempting to allocate me to the bottom of the barrel of social class and acceptance! They were trying to create an inferior person! It did much damage and confusion! Now, I know what I was up against!
So, I was never free of her! I was always living with her!
I could never let go of the original family or the original experience! I was a human being! And it should be horribly hard! It is for a human being!
I was not around human beings; these were lawless monsters! Not at first; I did not recognize them! I did not know what I was dealing with!
I was slow in processing information! I was not getting enough experiences! No one was looking out for my future or development or well being! I did not understand! Now I understand!
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I was living off of or with someone! I could not function on my own! I still cant! I cant deal with strait reality and no control over my future or what I do with my life!
I have resentments against this group for not preparing me for life! When I was all willing to do so! However, now I know what I was dealing with; so Im not the journey of letting go of them! Slow process!
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As for hating women; I wouldn't waist my breath on them! Meaning, I would not waist my time on women that actually deserved to be hated! Let someone else do it! Why would I waist my time with it!
There is a group of people that are my people; Im not sure who they are or where Ill find them!