Our partner

User avatar
OMNICELL
Consumer 6
Consumer 6
 
Posts: 1035
Joined: Tue Nov 15, 2011 5:06 am
Blog: View Blog (1029)
Archives
- December 2019
Vile hatred and anger.
   Thu Dec 12, 2019 4:18 pm
more changes ahead.
   Sun Dec 01, 2019 4:49 pm

+ November 2019
+ October 2019
+ September 2019
+ August 2019
+ July 2019
+ June 2019
+ May 2019
+ April 2019
+ March 2019
+ February 2019
+ January 2019
+ December 2018
+ November 2018
+ October 2018
+ September 2018
+ August 2018
+ July 2018
+ June 2018
+ May 2018
+ April 2018
+ March 2018
+ February 2018
+ January 2018
+ December 2017
+ November 2017
+ October 2017
+ September 2017
+ August 2017
+ July 2017
+ June 2017
+ May 2017
+ April 2017
+ March 2017
+ February 2017
+ January 2017
+ December 2016
+ November 2016
+ September 2016
+ August 2016
+ July 2016
+ June 2016
+ May 2016
+ April 2016
+ March 2016
+ February 2016
+ January 2016
+ December 2015
+ November 2015
+ October 2015
+ September 2015
+ August 2015
+ April 2015
+ March 2015
+ February 2015
+ January 2015
+ December 2014
+ November 2014
+ October 2014
+ September 2014
+ August 2014
+ July 2014
+ June 2014
+ May 2014
+ April 2014
+ March 2014
+ February 2014
+ January 2014
+ December 2013
+ November 2013
+ October 2013
+ September 2013
+ August 2013
+ July 2013
+ June 2013
+ May 2013
+ April 2013
+ March 2013
+ February 2013
+ January 2013
+ December 2012
+ November 2012
+ October 2012
+ September 2012
+ August 2012
+ July 2012
+ June 2012
+ May 2012
+ April 2012
+ March 2012
+ February 2012
+ January 2012
+ December 2011
+ November 2011
Search Blogs

hard times in the meetings

Permanent Linkby OMNICELL on Wed Apr 16, 2014 12:10 am

Im getting better, but Im not cured. Lots of girls want attention but they don't want me! They want attention from who ever is dumb enough to look in there direction. Im attempting to stop because its not real!
.

ITs time for it to stop! Ive played along on the sidelines, being strung along because I don't have a life. Im building a life! and Im rehabbing from mental and addiction problems! Im being taken advantage of. I will stop being taken advantage of when I stop participating in someone else's party where I was never invited in the first place. I feel like a party crasher! It was never safe! I was never liked! I was played by a set of girls in a clique! Im not the only one. Now I am wishing to forget that they exist and move on through! and this is so tuff!
.

I want nothing to do with the idea of association of these people. I would like to get to the point that they do not exist. It is already happening! Its slow, Im forgiving them over n over until they are gone!
.

This is hard on a mans ego! and its all about my ego. Im not wanted by these young women! and that is horribly scary to deal with! I must pull back into my corner! I will allow them to think they have it going on!
.

I must pull back into my corner and hide a bit and let them pass! stay away from me, stay away!
.

I want them away from me! They are not real and not good for my recovery!
.

And I must prey this out until I am convinced they are not good for recovery! They are no good! I must work to get the rest of me to understand this! its very hard! They are good looking!
.

-------------------------------------------
.
Positives:
.

At the meeting, I spoke, a young women was staring at me a few times, I brushed it of. She had mentioned my name from the day before when she was sharing...
.

At the end of the meetings, she walked over to me and called out my name! she wanted to stand by me because she didn't feel safe around anyone else; thus she did stand by me!
.

This women felt safe enough without really knowing me, to stand next to me! It has taken years of work for this simple act to occur in the way that attracted someone naturally! It was interesting! This is the opposite of dissociative disorder! This is good news...
.

And many other good things have been happening, slowly!
.

Dissociative Disorder
CPTSD
AVPD; Social avoidance
Previous/Psychotic clinical Depression
agoraphobia
obsessive/compulsive disorder
Evolution didn't stop my death, God did .....Now what?
0 Comments Viewed 9380 times

Who is online

Registered users: Bing [Bot], Google [Bot], Google Adsense [Bot], Google Feedfetcher, Majestic-12 [Bot], monster22, MSN [Bot], Notlookingback, TeddyBear the helper, TheRoseSystem, Wally58