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OMNICELL
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Consumer 6
 
Posts: 1035
Joined: Tue Nov 15, 2011 5:06 am
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- December 2019
Vile hatred and anger.
   Thu Dec 12, 2019 4:18 pm
more changes ahead.
   Sun Dec 01, 2019 4:49 pm

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Happiness

Permanent Linkby OMNICELL on Tue Jun 04, 2019 11:04 am

Im finding bits n pieces on how to be happy; it was never safe for me to be happy; I used to say; if I was rich and taken care of; I would be happy; simply because I would not be around trashy people and I would be safe.
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The people Im around right now; many of them Im not happy with because its better then being alone; but they are not people I wanted to be around; Im around them for necessity. Im just trying to survive.
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Im learning how to be happy on my own. I do not believe a person is really independent and on their own until they are are happy.
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Ive needed as a much love ad support as I can squeeze out to gain a foothold back into life; the only thing missing from my life was a caring loving family; with out that; I was thrown out to the wolves; and that exactly what happened; Human beings are meat eaters; their predators; However, because of the laws; you cant fight back; so, I being a predator; cant use it; but it seems every other predator out here gets to use it against me on a daily basis; so; I stay quiet until my time. Im slowly and silently learning how to become happy.
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Happiness is elusive in these harder days of life. Things are harder now. However, Im learning how to become happy.
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Ive been around people; they just want to bring me down; so I stay silent. Any people I've gotten involved with; they try to take over and control.
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Ive seen allot of bad people in my life; horrible amounts of them; worthless; Godless. Not decent people.
My land has turned into a cesspool of corruption and greed ran by the banks. The people; the citizens are now second class citizens; used by the banks and the rich.
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The point is; I wanted this utopia but could not find a place for it; no one would allow it. I had no one helping me; only helping me if it helped themselves first.
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Ive had to cover my identity completely so no one really knows me; and no one has really cared anyway.
Ive been treated like garbage by people because they could not use me; now they want nothing to do with me; never trusted me in the first place; thats because they are corrupt and think their better then others; and when I showed up; I could care less. They don't trust me or respect me; and thats just fine. Could care less. Im just trying to get ahead.
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Im working with the universe to stabilize and believe again. Im a broken kid that never got started; I was destroyed when young from everything around me; unbelievable. I had no idea; no idea of what the world was life; nothing; I was eaten alive. Could have killed myself 1000 times over; unbelievable.
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Ive found no women of any worth except the truly broken; they are innocent; the rest are deceivers; corrupt. They do not love anything; they might love children; but now; I doubt that as well; after what I've witnessed; they do not love men the way they love children; they see men as a means to an end; they see them as creatures they can use to better their existence on planet earth; they have no respect for the male creature; their to be used for no other reason then to be used; its as if men are inanimate object; very much how Ted Bundy the serial killer looks at women and children; same thing; exactly the same thing. Women are systematically destroyed the nation; they seem to have no concept of right or wrong or a conscious.
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I have found no women that have a conscious; nothing; They do not take any responsibility for their behavior; nothing; they simply try to get away with things; what ever they can. They are not safe to discourse with; they are deceptive from the minute you meet them; not real; complete false front with no conscious to use it against someone. They are not safe to have a conversation with; as they will attempt to smash the conversation if it does not go in their direction; they behead it; try to cut it off; impossible for free ability to express ones feelings around them; or the truth. completely impossible; I simply walk away. I refuse to be someones parol officer. Its not my job to correct someones corrupt nature when speaking with them; if their not in their place; I walk away.
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Ive been completely fooled by women; manipulated simply because they thought it fun; but we were not playing fun n games; no one set the rules for such things; but women dont care about rules; it means nothing to them; they are lawless; literally no respect for laws; meaning; women were playing me simply to play a game against another innocent American citizen; they respect nothing; its unbelievable; Im a witness to this; an honest witness.. I am shocked and saddened. I am truly saddened; for this means I walk the earth alone. And I am confused about this; it is not natural for them to act this way; it is against the universe and God and mother nature; it is wrong. And women do not care if it is wrong or wrong and right; and for this reason; I go my own way; I find my own happiness and if I attract someone like me that wants to be innocent and real and happy; so be it.
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When I was younger; I wanted to meet a nice girl; but its never happened. its never happened; its never happened. Ive been fooled by women play acting an innocent roll, and they’ve put on a complete false front; I had no idea it was fake; not because Im stupid but in a sense naive; women would put up this false front in front of God and try to get away with it; for they do not respect God either; or the universe that created them; I dont understand; They seem to have no respect for anything; nothing. and no conscious; nothing; they do not question their own behavior; right from wrong; nothing; and ive seen this over n over n over n over n over n over n over; nothing. Im forced to walk away from them.
Women see me as someone to take advantage of because I was stupid enough to associate with them in the first place; no respect for anyone or anything; they seek only to take advantage of people.
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And I mentioned; Ive seen them destroy children; Ive seen them destroy children as much or more then bad men; their no different; no conscious. Nothing.
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Ive given women the choice to be around me or have my love; but because I come off as stumbling or weak; they change their minds; find an alfa male that will bread them and be more solid when they have grandchildren; thats all they are really interested in; the kind of man means nothing; is resources mean everything.
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Ive seen women complain that their no good men left; In complete shock; I looked around and saw that 80% of the average good guys are everywhere. Stumped; I did not understand this statement; until I finely realized; they were talking about the 20% alfa males; nothing else; they were suggesting; theirs no good alfa males left to date or hook up with; the 20%; and those males; their worth was based on their looks or resources; nothing more; as I said; women do not love men; they love children and they love a mans resources; if the man cannot produce for them; through hypergamy and monkey branching; they look for another man; they move up the food chain; not down; and of course; they lie about who they are to the new man; complete manipulation; using him completely; they have no interest in him; only his resources. They have no issue on divorcing a man and finding another and another and another. Cheating does not mean anything to them; anymore; At that specific time of the month before their period; they go into a hyper arousal mode; and such modes are made for reproducing offspring; thus they start dressing up and wanting to go to the bar with their girlfriends; thats what they tell their husbands; in reality; their going to hook up with someone. So; Im wondering if any kind of real relationship between men and women can occur.
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of course it would not be fair if I leave men out of the triangle; plenty of men cheat on women and drink and cause problems; yes? Not so; the complaint women have about men; its not men; its 20% of the sociopathic alfa males they hook up with; these sociopaths are able to produce resources because they have no conscious; women complain because these sociopaths are monsters and women get treated as objects; what do you expect; these women are dating monsters; and yet they stay with them; well; these are alfa males who produce; women will continue to stay with them as long as these men prove they can fight off other males; being strong enough or the strong males in any tribe; but these males are horrible animals; but women dont care; these are sociopaths but their the strongest males in the group; even tho they have no conscious; and will mindlessly destroy everything in their path and everyone one; women dont care; women are looking for the alpha male that produces; it matters not if they are human or not; of course such in human types of these are horrible for children; they devour children destroy them; sociopaths eat children for lunch; but women do not seem to care; and this has got me completely confused; its totally and completely corrupt; way beyond God and the universe and the natural order of things. My conclusion; women are corrupt and seek corrupt men to associate with; criminals; thugs; nothing more. And for some God offal reason; they allow their children around such monsters, where the children are raped and mentally destroyed and physically destroyed. Unbelievable; and its pure evil. And they dont care about their own citizens in their own country; nothing; blank.... And they dont seem to respect their country or the country that gave them life liberty or the pursuit of happiness. No value. nothing.
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Im completely bewildered and shocked concerning women; I do not think they love anything; They certainly dont love men; so; its all very confusing for me; I just wanted to find a nice girl to love; impossible. No such animal exists accept in children’s books from long ago.
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I am not dismayed by this; or other problems in my country; I will continue to seek out quiet happiness. Go my own way; and I would never have thought I would be doing that; but now that my eyes are open; Im interested in my own happiness first; possibly I can attract someone that would like to join in that happiness. The universe will bring them.
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Right now; I have to learn to get on my feet again; this means liking me; while the rest of the world does not. And they dont; Ive had numerous people despise me; they have no idea who their talking to.
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As for women; non of them respect me; not one; not really; most see me as a weakling of no use to them; thats because I see through them when their trying to take over and be in control of things; and I ignore them. Women are predators and not safe for children or men or any other species on the planet; no matter what they get involved in; if they are not kept in cages and controlled; they will destroy everything they touch. And we are seeing this in our country right now as the place goes broke, defranchised, and morally decapitated.
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And I suppose after this writing; some idiot will start blaming me for the way women act; or blame me for reporting on it; as usual; taking no responsibility for their actions.
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Dont get me wrong; theirs plenty of corruption in the world; Im pointing out some of it; Im not suggesting all people are bad; but lots of them are; much more then I ever imagined as a kid; many more; and ive seen horror; so, I know what Im talking about. As for women; why would I enjoy reporting on this; I would like it much better if I was accepted by women; but Im not; never have been and never will be.
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Women have liked me for 2 reason and only 2; if they liked the way I looked and my resources; if I had no resources; I had to be good looking; but no one ever cared who I am; my identity; no one; it didnt matter; well it does matter.
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It matters who I am; and it matters that I find people who see me for who I am and make that the sole judgment of interest in me. Im not interested in anyone else. As for women; I have no resources so; theirs not interest. Im shunned; and its as simple as that.
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Why dont I have any resources; because I was destroyed by the same country Im a citizen in; and I was destroyed when a child; and who did this; certainly many adult women did this; along with alpha males of a sociopathic breading. most nice people did not destroy me; but nice people had their hands tied by the laws and could not help me.
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I know I can become happy; my thoughts have to change; I have to protect them; and I have to keep working at success based thinking.

Dissociative Disorder
CPTSD
AVPD; Social avoidance
Previous/Psychotic clinical Depression
agoraphobia
obsessive/compulsive disorder
Evolution didn't stop my death, God did .....Now what?
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