As I let go of the girl at the meetings... As it becomes yesterdays news. It all starts to unwind. I begin to see it for what it is. A closer look at what it is....
Its now becoming quit simple and easy to understand.
I use playing techniques on women. I know how to use several of them. It makes me stand out, and look and act different and pushes the alpha male role. Lots of beautiful women end up attracted to me. Thus begins the problem...
The same women attracted to me end up going out with sociopaths. Theres dominating alpha guys are considerers good looking and popular by the women; within the meeting places. I never understood this; How can a women who listens to me talk at meetings, and is attracted to me, also find a sociopath attractive?
I cant be around a true sociopath for more then 3 minutes or I will kill them. I knew a few of them, they have no rules, no boundaries, they hate authority of any kind, including state and federal authorities.
How can a women with depth and intelligence and feelings enjoy the company of a sociopath?
It finally hit me!
Because of the alpha male routines I pull on women, I attract a specific kind of beautiful women. Yet, what do they see; the same kind of alpha male they always respond to... However, in this group , the alpha males in these bandit-o 12 step groups that dominates are sociopathic.. They always dominate!
The dominating males in my group, the ones the women love; act like I act!. however, Im not acting. They are.. They are mimicking... Its very interesting to watch... The sociopathic women are interested in the pathological males mimicked personalities. In addition they are interested in my personality. They cant seem to tell the difference between me or the sociopath... Interesting..!
I realized finally with a sigh of relief that the beautiful girls I was attracting were sociopaths... Thats why they did not recognize my faltering behaviors, my serious side of grief, and the ability to need down time and personal space. Im a human being, they did not recognize these characteristics; therefore, they never responded in a way that I would understand. I had no idea where these girls were coming from when I had problems; they were sociopaths, this is why I did not understand! They would move on to another guy because I appeared weak.
The real sociopaths in the group attract the sociopathic women, and its one big happy family.. Now I understand that all people in the meetings fall into these personality disorder situations..
In these meetings, the stronger monster wins... Its all very interesting. However, Im not at these meetings anymore. I stopped.. Im involved in a bit more mellow mature fellowship at this point in time.
The girls would or could destroy me emotionally or spiritually, by abandoning me for another man; and still would walk up to me to say hello as if nothing ever happened; very unnerving and bizarre!
God has been laughing at me, laughing with me!.. He never said yes to the girl in the meetings.. Now I know why....
Now as I get stronger I take my skills outward to the real world and practice.
All very interesting!