Our partner

User avatar
OMNICELL
Consumer 6
Consumer 6
 
Posts: 1052
Joined: Tue Nov 15, 2011 5:06 am
Blog: View Blog (1751)
Archives
- March 2024
A gift from God #2
   Sat Mar 16, 2024 9:21 pm
The Gift from God…
   Tue Mar 12, 2024 5:29 pm
2 goals; elements of accomplishment
   Tue Mar 12, 2024 1:41 pm
Work Ethic is Needed Please
   Tue Mar 12, 2024 4:46 am
Some Solutions; Lot of Hope
   Thu Mar 07, 2024 5:39 am

+ February 2024
+ January 2024
+ December 2023
+ November 2023
+ October 2023
+ September 2023
+ August 2023
+ July 2023
+ June 2023
+ May 2023
+ April 2023
+ March 2023
+ February 2023
+ January 2023
+ December 2022
+ November 2022
+ October 2022
+ September 2022
+ August 2022
+ July 2022
+ June 2022
+ May 2022
+ April 2022
+ March 2022
+ February 2022
+ January 2022
+ December 2021
+ November 2021
+ October 2021
+ September 2021
+ August 2021
+ July 2021
+ June 2021
+ May 2021
+ April 2021
+ March 2021
+ February 2021
+ January 2021
+ December 2020
+ November 2020
+ October 2020
+ September 2020
+ August 2020
+ July 2020
+ June 2020
+ May 2020
+ April 2020
+ March 2020
+ February 2020
+ January 2020
+ December 2019
+ November 2019
+ October 2019
+ September 2019
+ August 2019
+ July 2019
+ June 2019
+ May 2019
+ April 2019
+ March 2019
+ February 2019
+ January 2019
+ December 2018
+ November 2018
+ October 2018
+ September 2018
+ August 2018
+ July 2018
+ June 2018
+ May 2018
+ April 2018
+ March 2018
+ February 2018
+ January 2018
+ December 2017
+ November 2017
+ October 2017
+ September 2017
+ August 2017
+ July 2017
+ June 2017
+ May 2017
+ April 2017
+ March 2017
+ February 2017
+ January 2017
+ December 2016
+ November 2016
+ September 2016
+ August 2016
+ July 2016
+ June 2016
+ May 2016
+ April 2016
+ March 2016
+ February 2016
+ January 2016
+ December 2015
+ November 2015
+ October 2015
+ September 2015
+ August 2015
+ April 2015
+ March 2015
+ February 2015
+ January 2015
+ December 2014
+ November 2014
+ October 2014
+ September 2014
+ August 2014
+ July 2014
+ June 2014
+ May 2014
+ April 2014
+ March 2014
+ February 2014
+ January 2014
+ December 2013
+ November 2013
+ October 2013
+ September 2013
+ August 2013
+ July 2013
+ June 2013
+ May 2013
+ April 2013
+ March 2013
+ February 2013
+ January 2013
+ December 2012
+ November 2012
+ October 2012
+ September 2012
+ August 2012
+ July 2012
+ June 2012
+ May 2012
+ April 2012
+ March 2012
+ February 2012
+ January 2012
+ December 2011
+ November 2011
Search Blogs

Girlfriends and sex friends!

Permanent Linkby OMNICELL on Tue Feb 02, 2016 6:02 pm

Sex Friends! Hmmm? I don't know! friends with benefits! You get to use their bodies for sex! but what about afterwards! I long for a relationship with someone other then who I just had sex with! You have sex; you go back to being friends! you see the person but don't want to hold their hands in public or look like your dating! seems really dishonest! I don't know!
.

Im scared of the real thing; to be interactive with! I suppose with enough experience; I would not have to ask these questions!
.

The major point is; Im changing; their is a shift of independence occurring! As for a girlfriend! I see someone normal who drives a car, that I'm close to, like best friends, and we go places together and get along together! securely! I am not put down for nothing being enough!

.
Ive gone through horrible rejection! In fact, it was the TV that never rejected me! the rest of the world did!
.

In TV land I was OK! in the real world, I was hated or rejected! mis understood! but they never cared anyway! I was of no interest or importance! I was thrown away! the first thing this tells me; they never had God within them! it was all a lie! and this tells me! the nature of the communities I lived in; they were not my kind of people! I belong to something else somewhere else! I was taken advantage of; stole from, raped! you name it! abused! and many of these are what you would call middle class people! People with intelligence or businesses or money or education!
.

none of these were my people!
.

Who are my people! all this will be taken to God!

.
Im starting to see visions of a girlfriend sitting next to me in a car as we go on a trip! So, Im getting closer to what Im interested in! its naturally coming out again! is been a great long time!
.

In the past I ended up falling for sociopaths! and it did not work! even if they between real and pathological; I could not stand the pathological part of them; nor was it my responsibility! These type see strength vs weakness! these are not my type of people! I am friendly and base things on friendship and how comparable we get along and love! but it must be with the right people! the wrong ones don't appreciate anything or anyone! They are little better then animals
.

The problem is or was! I was being severely thrown away and abused, so the original me was not developed! I would have been around very nice introverted intelligent upper middle class children! that did not happen! I was rejected by those children because I came from an abusive home; my intelligence or abilities were not the point! I was hated as a loser or scum bag! its about the caste system! I was thrown away! this situation was created by the psychopaths! it was not my doing or fault! nothing I could do about it! I was all alone being destroyed on a daily basis through lies, neglect, contempt and bulling! I did not have a chance! I became full of PTSD and getting worse! the world around me abandon me! I had God, but for a long long time it seemed I had no one!

.
Now, as my thinking comes back! Im interested in a real girlfriend! I suppose this means; a real person! vs a shallow prom queen type! I have no money! but they like the way I look! but it wont work! maybe for sex!

.
Im attracting the wrong people! but at least as I wake up, I learn that Im attracting someone!

.
I go to allot of meetings for recovery and this is no place to date women! I know!
.
The women I date would have to be outside of this place! I would have to find them and learn how to interact with them! and that is my new direction!

.
Fear; how do I interact with new people when I come from a background like mine! I have allot of work to work on! and I take all things to God!

.

Dissociative Disorder
CPTSD
AVPD; Social avoidance
Previous/Psychotic clinical Depression
agoraphobia
obsessive/compulsive disorder
Evolution didn't stop my death, God did .....Now what?
0 Comments Viewed 12986 times

Who is online

Registered users: Bing [Bot], Google [Bot], Google Feedfetcher, krk1087