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OMNICELL
Consumer 6
Consumer 6
 
Posts: 1035
Joined: Tue Nov 15, 2011 5:06 am
Blog: View Blog (1009)
Archives
- August 2019
Finding my voice
   Tue Aug 20, 2019 4:47 pm
Three important conversations with women
   Tue Aug 20, 2019 1:39 am
I letting socioapths attack me again; abuse me; feel demoralized
   Mon Aug 19, 2019 11:23 am
Mellowing; and idea of exploring the entrances to the gap...
   Mon Aug 19, 2019 1:20 am
A house and a backyard and 4 walls and a hobby
   Sun Aug 18, 2019 1:09 am
moving into know mans land (positive); and then through
   Fri Aug 16, 2019 9:41 pm
The Gap
   Wed Aug 14, 2019 8:37 pm
Teenage years
   Wed Aug 14, 2019 2:25 am
finding and painting rocks
   Tue Aug 13, 2019 5:14 pm
Expressing my feelings
   Tue Aug 13, 2019 3:26 pm
I know Ive never met any women to date ever....
   Tue Aug 13, 2019 11:02 am
Being alone all of my life with out women or a relationship
   Tue Aug 13, 2019 10:16 am
The wright brothers created plaines; Im creating my new life
   Tue Aug 13, 2019 8:41 am
A new era is starting; But Ive got problems
   Mon Aug 12, 2019 12:19 pm
Signs of the end is here; and a new era starting
   Sun Aug 11, 2019 6:13 pm
Trapped between 2 worlds
   Sun Aug 11, 2019 3:23 pm
Things are getting better; Im still fat; I got a problem
   Fri Aug 09, 2019 11:38 pm
Women have defeated me? and I feel deated? #1
   Fri Aug 09, 2019 6:45 am
Plans from the universe; they have cometh
   Wed Aug 07, 2019 4:39 pm
breaking things and coming together
   Wed Aug 07, 2019 11:44 am
What am I thinking about
   Wed Aug 07, 2019 4:16 am
That breaking point
   Tue Aug 06, 2019 8:45 pm
Needing my mothers permission
   Tue Aug 06, 2019 5:47 pm
And another day
   Tue Aug 06, 2019 5:03 pm
Im so right in the middle of the promises
   Tue Aug 06, 2019 4:35 pm
whats missing with music; live playing
   Mon Aug 05, 2019 11:22 pm
Women and John Denver
   Sun Aug 04, 2019 11:33 pm
Bulling
   Sun Aug 04, 2019 1:33 am
art images coming back and other things; taking action
   Sat Aug 03, 2019 8:35 pm
I wasn't suppose to break the my first girls heart....
   Sat Aug 03, 2019 12:47 pm
Take my mother out of the picture; what do I get.
   Fri Aug 02, 2019 11:47 pm
Where am at right now.
   Thu Aug 01, 2019 11:30 am

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Fears going back to childhood; problems with women

Permanent Linkby OMNICELL on Mon Oct 08, 2018 12:47 pm

So; their are problems with women; general fears stemming from my childhood! This sound like a women hating situation! its not quit; its a general fear of everything problem! Women have little to do with it; if anything! In fact; they are the most neutral of situations! The main problem is; I want women; thats why Im always bringing it up! Ive gotten as far as phone numbers; but the children in me stop me! I get blocked! And Im trying to take over my own system and un block it!
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The child in me does not want to see his mother! For she as of a satanic origin and unsafe! And so I try to stay away! When I see women; I see satan; they are unsafe manipulators! They have no conscious; no decrement for right or wrong; Seem to have no interest in reasoning skills; nothing! unsafe!
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I do not feel safe around people! So; how am I going to bring women into my life!
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Actually, I do bring women into my life; but their the wrong women! thats the problem! Im not around the right ones!
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I can laid any time I want! The problem is; I dont want to get laid by women Im not emotionally interested in; meaning! I will fall to pieces because the women will be done with sex and Ill be all alone! The way to solve this; have a girlfriend!
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Im interested in an Asian soulmate; nothing else; So; Im working with the universe on this! I have blocks to getting close to people; and yet, I tell you I want an Asian-soulmate!
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So; the fear is real; real of rejection or getting hurt; However, I have the friendly universe on my side to bring me what I visualize!
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ITs hard to visualize something right now; I have to work through blocks that I can complete visualization align with my inner being; this is the most Strenuous of situations these days; of the day!
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I have to learn to follow through on my visualizations until I am aligned with my inner being; I dont get to stop the process and dissociate; that is the problem! The outcome is not important; the process is important; their lies a bottleneck in the process and I have to fix it; and Im working on facing the fear of getting close to this bottleneck that I fix it!

Dissociative Disorder
CPTSD
AVPD; Social avoidance
Previous/Psychotic clinical Depression
agoraphobia
obsessive/compulsive disorder
Evolution didn't stop my death, God did .....Now what?
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