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OMNICELL
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Joined: Tue Nov 15, 2011 5:06 am
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FB down; glad to know everything isn't owned by FB

Permanent Linkby OMNICELL on Thu Mar 14, 2019 2:23 am

I'm in the middle of a paradigm shift or wanting one to start or wanting to move through it. I'm stuck or in a holding pattern, or more realistically, haven't really worked through the paradigm and I have to. I'm looking to expand upon looking for my wife, money, activities, truck, using and developing talents; and being around the right people!
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A gap resides between where I'm at and where I want to be; generally from 6 o7 years old to 16 years old. a gap. And it has to be closed up! I Remember television; TV shows; that's all I remember; I learned nothing socially; completely dissociated with no experience. And I was all alone and never knew it; I was 2 young to understand the world was taking advantage of me and didn't care.
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I've missed a lot of things; almost all of my life.
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I keep working it at. Working with God for pathways to unfold, and there it is; It's hard for pathways to unfold if I have no name for what is trying to unfold. I'm dissociative in those areas.
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The key is to understand what it is I want; what am I going for or who! And then; hang on and let the universe unfold it. The problem is in the beginning; believing what I want. I mean; actually believing what I want. It's in the beginning; what do I really want; am I in touch with what I really want! Will I allow myself to work to a point of knowing what I want; allowing it to surface; that's the work; seems to be covered in massive passive aggression. Not fun. bad thoughts all around from a life that went nowhere.
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So. I have my work cut out for me; for a new life and to believe it's possible and I'm not going to be destroyed like the last other lives.
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Dissociative Disorder
CPTSD
AVPD; Social avoidance
Previous/Psychotic clinical Depression
agoraphobia
obsessive/compulsive disorder
Evolution didn't stop my death, God did .....Now what?
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