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OMNICELL
Consumer 6
Consumer 6
 
Posts: 1035
Joined: Tue Nov 15, 2011 5:06 am
Blog: View Blog (1009)
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- August 2019
Finding my voice
   Tue Aug 20, 2019 4:47 pm
Three important conversations with women
   Tue Aug 20, 2019 1:39 am
I letting socioapths attack me again; abuse me; feel demoralized
   Mon Aug 19, 2019 11:23 am
Mellowing; and idea of exploring the entrances to the gap...
   Mon Aug 19, 2019 1:20 am
A house and a backyard and 4 walls and a hobby
   Sun Aug 18, 2019 1:09 am
moving into know mans land (positive); and then through
   Fri Aug 16, 2019 9:41 pm
The Gap
   Wed Aug 14, 2019 8:37 pm
Teenage years
   Wed Aug 14, 2019 2:25 am
finding and painting rocks
   Tue Aug 13, 2019 5:14 pm
Expressing my feelings
   Tue Aug 13, 2019 3:26 pm
I know Ive never met any women to date ever....
   Tue Aug 13, 2019 11:02 am
Being alone all of my life with out women or a relationship
   Tue Aug 13, 2019 10:16 am
The wright brothers created plaines; Im creating my new life
   Tue Aug 13, 2019 8:41 am
A new era is starting; But Ive got problems
   Mon Aug 12, 2019 12:19 pm
Signs of the end is here; and a new era starting
   Sun Aug 11, 2019 6:13 pm
Trapped between 2 worlds
   Sun Aug 11, 2019 3:23 pm
Things are getting better; Im still fat; I got a problem
   Fri Aug 09, 2019 11:38 pm
Women have defeated me? and I feel deated? #1
   Fri Aug 09, 2019 6:45 am
Plans from the universe; they have cometh
   Wed Aug 07, 2019 4:39 pm
breaking things and coming together
   Wed Aug 07, 2019 11:44 am
What am I thinking about
   Wed Aug 07, 2019 4:16 am
That breaking point
   Tue Aug 06, 2019 8:45 pm
Needing my mothers permission
   Tue Aug 06, 2019 5:47 pm
And another day
   Tue Aug 06, 2019 5:03 pm
Im so right in the middle of the promises
   Tue Aug 06, 2019 4:35 pm
whats missing with music; live playing
   Mon Aug 05, 2019 11:22 pm
Women and John Denver
   Sun Aug 04, 2019 11:33 pm
Bulling
   Sun Aug 04, 2019 1:33 am
art images coming back and other things; taking action
   Sat Aug 03, 2019 8:35 pm
I wasn't suppose to break the my first girls heart....
   Sat Aug 03, 2019 12:47 pm
Take my mother out of the picture; what do I get.
   Fri Aug 02, 2019 11:47 pm
Where am at right now.
   Thu Aug 01, 2019 11:30 am

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Depersonalization; a big problem!

Permanent Linkby OMNICELL on Tue Jun 07, 2016 5:28 am

Im having or have a big problem dealing with depersonalization! I have dissociative disorder, and these symptoms are showing!

Im better then I used to be; but can still not get close to people! I can shake hands and hug at times; but Im still in the corner of the room!

Most women wont talk to me!; they are to ######6 shallow! What do I expect! But Im not flirting with them either!

Im not close to anyone or getting close to anyone!

Women; they're waiting for me to ask them out! But Im not close enough or know anyone to ask out!

Most women I meet are 2 shallow!

So, there are still problems! And with many people; I will never get close to them; it will never happen! So, I need to meet better people or other people!

So, people are of the day! At least I can see what Im saying here! Im talking about meeting people! So, this is different! It means I see them differently! I don't see them as the bad creatures I used to see them as!

I was ruined and destroyed as a boy and teenager! It is horrible! Its to bad; a disservice! It is what it is! I never planned on it happening and never saw it coming and I'm lucky to be alive or functioning ! I had massive plans for myself and my future life! It was ruined! Im hoping to get it back!

I was ruined by psychopaths! They are like lizards or wolves! No conscious! No human laws! Nothing!

I was unprepared for it!

Anxiety is a big problem! And I don't know anyone! Im floating around 12 step meetings, trying to get better! But Im not connected to anyone; I never have been! I have to work with God to see if I can come back to normal around decent people!

Im still working on manifesting a practice room! I suppose this is a part of the journey; a long journey I guess! To bad! I feel like; by the time I get a practice room; ill die of old age! None of this makes sense! However, Ill work at creating a new story for my life and keep writing and working on it!

The most important goal; how to believe! That is the most important goal!

Day after day after after week, after month after month!

The goal is to believe! What will it take to believe! This is my number one goal in life!

I cant become a billionaire if you tell yourself you cant! If you learn to believe;' you not only can be a billionaire, you can be anything you want! Thats why believing is so important! First you think, then you believe it, then you receive it!

One has to go the distance; learn how to believe!

Learn how to love!

Heres the deal; if their was an easy way to kill myself! I be oudda here! Because there is not! I will turn to other ways to survive! So, that I may have meaning to all of this!

I have to keep working with the Laws of attraction until I believe!

=========================================================

As I get better, the idea is to reach out to others regardless! most people I associate with don't give me respect or understand me! I have to continue to work on things!

Dissociative Disorder
CPTSD
AVPD; Social avoidance
Previous/Psychotic clinical Depression
agoraphobia
obsessive/compulsive disorder
Evolution didn't stop my death, God did .....Now what?
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