Our partner

User avatar
OMNICELL
Consumer 6
Consumer 6
 
Posts: 1035
Joined: Tue Nov 15, 2011 5:06 am
Blog: View Blog (1025)
Archives
- November 2019
Social skills improving
   Thu Nov 07, 2019 12:51 am
My goal is to work through adolescence.
   Fri Nov 01, 2019 9:16 pm

+ October 2019
+ September 2019
+ August 2019
+ July 2019
+ June 2019
+ May 2019
+ April 2019
+ March 2019
+ February 2019
+ January 2019
+ December 2018
+ November 2018
+ October 2018
+ September 2018
+ August 2018
+ July 2018
+ June 2018
+ May 2018
+ April 2018
+ March 2018
+ February 2018
+ January 2018
+ December 2017
+ November 2017
+ October 2017
+ September 2017
+ August 2017
+ July 2017
+ June 2017
+ May 2017
+ April 2017
+ March 2017
+ February 2017
+ January 2017
+ December 2016
+ November 2016
+ September 2016
+ August 2016
+ July 2016
+ June 2016
+ May 2016
+ April 2016
+ March 2016
+ February 2016
+ January 2016
+ December 2015
+ November 2015
+ October 2015
+ September 2015
+ August 2015
+ April 2015
+ March 2015
+ February 2015
+ January 2015
+ December 2014
+ November 2014
+ October 2014
+ September 2014
+ August 2014
+ July 2014
+ June 2014
+ May 2014
+ April 2014
+ March 2014
+ February 2014
+ January 2014
+ December 2013
+ November 2013
+ October 2013
+ September 2013
+ August 2013
+ July 2013
+ June 2013
+ May 2013
+ April 2013
+ March 2013
+ February 2013
+ January 2013
+ December 2012
+ November 2012
+ October 2012
+ September 2012
+ August 2012
+ July 2012
+ June 2012
+ May 2012
+ April 2012
+ March 2012
+ February 2012
+ January 2012
+ December 2011
+ November 2011
Search Blogs

Dealing with the master manipulated

Permanent Linkby OMNICELL on Thu Feb 13, 2014 11:07 am

Im learning as I wake up, who to trust and who not to trust!

When Im more-asleep-psychologically, Ive allowed many unsafe people to meander around my space. As I wake up Im seeing a new light on people I never saw before. Several people I have trusted are not trust worthy.

Im learning the hard way as I wake up!

I have one friend that Ive been calling! or , he called me! Yet, he is not safe, and the child in me comes out and starts letting out my feelings and emotions with this person as if safe. As my feelings and emotions spill, I feel freer and freer; and thats when I get caught! I get turned on! The predator in the other person spots weakness, weakness in me! they turn on me. Now what do I do!

I have to remember that the whole of the people Im around in recovery are predators of one nature or another! and I forget this at times. Im to comfortable in my surroundings.

Possibly someone has turned on me and I need to talk to someone else about it! However, the new person I talk to is the same of character to the person that turned on me! Im sabotaged by this new friend for talking about the other so called friend! Both are in the same group with me!

Im learning how to deal with many different forms of people! One area is; keep silent for awhile. Don't cause waves if Im suppose to stick around! Trust God until I can heal; don't rock the boat! keep the waters calm!

ITs very hard; its starts out innocent. I start talking about a manipulator thats been manipulating me from the beginning; Im now aware of it and Im mad. I explain this to my new friend on the phone!
My friend is a master manipulator that is waiting to manipulate me! He is of the same group; the same mentality!

As I talk about the other manipulators in the group, I get pulled into the phone call, deeper, n deeper, n deeper. As long as he is in control, everything is OK, as soon as he starts loosing control, he begins to question my integrity and sources of information. I have accused people of many things, and he would like the evidence! He is calling me a liar. He is not on mysids and never as been; did I forget this, or its easy to play friend when convenient.

I have to remember what Im doing in these groups. Im recovering. Not everyone wants to help! As I wake up, I need to remember where I am and with who! I need to be low key for awhile. The locals are getting restless; they want to hunt! I do not want to be the dinner steak on the menu!

Its my call, its up to me what to say! Its nice to have friends to talk to! its not so nice when they can't be trusted anymore then the problem people Im talking about.

-------------------

This is a real hard time. This requires steadfastness if Im going to survive! I have to get stronger! Im stuck in the middle of the upper middle. As I wake up, Im noticing, no one really knows me or understands me! I never noticed this when dissociative. Im starting to see this now! I assumed others could follow along! that can't! they can't follow where Im coming from! they don't want to! I guess.

When Im at meetings, Im talking about poverty! and how addiction is a part of poverty. The gaol is to get back to health away from poverty; do anything and everything I can to get away from poverty!

I have very little friends in these places. Im getting worse as people associations go!

I have a conscious, Im around allot of people that do not! Im around allot of control freaks.

Im getting blocked, and have to work through this! Not sure what to do here. Trust God. Trust what God wants me to do!

I have to work with God or I parish... Its all very hard! I have gained much, and lots of feedback!

However, most of the people from the meetings do not care for me or what I stand for. I suppose they never will! The truth means nothing to these people!

-------

At some point I have to get new clothing! and keep my room clean! Im not ready! but I have to. I don't have a choice! Im getting better!

-----

where do I go from here! I don't know. I keep trying to solve things with people that won't help. I am learning things! Im learning how to back of from the wrong people that could cause me harm!

Dissociative Disorder
CPTSD
AVPD; Social avoidance
Previous/Psychotic clinical Depression
agoraphobia
obsessive/compulsive disorder
Evolution didn't stop my death, God did .....Now what?
0 Comments Viewed 4339 times

Who is online

Registered users: 58gambling, Aaspeddycle, Assoudiops, Baidu [Spider], Bing [Bot], birdsong87, EllaBlack, everyone23, ghatoumpa, Google [Bot], Google Adsense [Bot], Google Feedfetcher, heracles, Majestic-12 [Bot], MenOfTheFutur, MonarchMind, MSN [Bot], Squaredonutwheels, Tony12Max, Tyler