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Search Blogs

critical voice and being creative

Permanent Linkby OMNICELL on Tue Jul 30, 2019 4:40 pm

Ive solved or God has helped solve or is solving or has solved several problems that baffled me.
Im looking to match vibrations.
I have a vibration of wanting my own car; I had to match vibrations with someone or something dealing with the outside world. That is called a " Gap"; A Gap is a divide; a blinding divide. One can come up to its edge but can see no way to cross. One sees a river or a ravine and no way to cross.
The idea of bridging a gap is what Im good at or getting good at. I know how to bridge a gap. The work is done in the imagination and then one must wait; hang on and wait until things start to appear in the imagination.
Techniques for clearing the gap; filling in the gap then creating a bridge
Since its my life and Im the creator; I can create the bridge that crosses the gap with in my imagination; but to do so; My imagination has to already be across on the other side; it must be done in vibration; once connected through vibration; then the rest will follow; the bridge will follow and crossing the bridge will follow.
In order for the imagination to create a bridge the imagination must expand in general to a place further then the destination; meaning; further then the end of the gap. I have to imagine that Im already across the gap and working on the other side of the gap and I've been on that other side for a year or more and Ive examples of experiences on the other side of the river; 12 experiences on the other side of the gap or river; I can write about on paper; Ive used a random number "12" for the fun of it; I like the number; it feels right for my writing.
My imagination has to expand; I expand it through written stories and visualizations; However, writing causes a form of visualizing in the mind; so; writing is fine.
I write about my desires before they show up. I write about my desires until they start to appear in my mind. However, they don't just " appear" Its more a boat going down an energy river...
The river;
So; Im in this boat going down energy river; Im not rowing the boat; Ive got my hands against each other in the boat; arms folded. Im letting the boat float down the river. Soon, things start to appear; I look forward; I see money; wads of money; just floating by me down the river; soon it picks up; more wads of money; They are surrounding the boat down the river.. slowly meandering by; soon, I see a car slowly passing me by in the opposite direction; its coming toward me but to the side; its slowly floating down the river. and then on the other side of me; another car is floating by.. And other cars show up sideways or slowly spinning as they slowly meander by me; down the river. And soon, I see 6 foot life like representations of Asian women; they are floating down the river; they are floating by randomly; like the wads of money; just floating by; and Im getting comfortable watching them float by; And soon off to the left; I see a house, and its on a raft and its flowing by; as it goes down the river. And my eyes are open. Soon; I see a movie screen of a plane taking me on vacation; and its on a raft floating down the river. And many more things I see showing up around me; just floating by; floating down the river.
And I realize; all of these things I desire are now floating down the river next to my boat; and next to me; in front of me, behind me. Im emerged in the things I desire as they float and meander next to me down the river.
At this point; we call this vibrational connection; Im in the realm with my desires; we are touching each other; at the same level as we meet on the river; they are floating down the river; my boat is slowly meandering down the river; we pass each other.... We have made connection; vibrational connection.
Vibration connection in the real world; not in the imagination.
So; whats next; Ive made contact with what I want in the vibrational world within my imagination. How is this vibration interpreted in the real world?
Within the real world; suddenly; Ill have and urge to walk up to someone I trust and talk; and tell them about my interested; Hey! Ive been thinking about a car" The other person response; Your interested in getting a car; you want a car; what about the insurance". And at that point; I realized; Im connecting with the right people about a car in the real world. And I can feel it. And that is the creation of the bridge; The universe is doing the work. Now; I have a friend of mine that wants to help me get a car; Im not sure how they will help me but they are on my side. And this is the building of the bridge.... They are the support I never got as a kid; and I can feel it and see the timing of it; its a connection... The indication of the bridge is; I now have a friend that wants to help; he is a support member helping me with car issues; he's shown up in the real world; just as the car showed up down the river in my imaginary world; why is this all happening; because at some point; thoughts turn to things. The first " thing" that showing up is support for my desire; someone who wants to help me get that desire and is with me to the end to help me grow into it.
Because the bridge has been built; does it mean a car shows up; the money for the car; no ; not yet; that is a different set of bridges...
So; Many bridges are showing up where the gap has been completed vibrationally,
Ive had a gap close concerning music; it closed vibrationally; meaning; the vibration from my desire and the vibration within my imagination have matched or met... OK; what does it look like? I see music creation in my imagination; and a sudden streak of intuition hit and I saw rows of men lined up; each with a number; and these men represented networking... So; I could network from one to another to another to another and get to where I want to go; and never run out of connections; I could be connected all over the country I live in. And thats what I needed to know how to do or see before I could create music; I needed to know I was inner connected. So; This vibration has met the other. what does this mean. It means what it means; its a sense of security; I have a reason to make music now; the insecurity is gone. Not perfect but its a start.
I remember being only around my mother and no one else when wanting to make music; so I lost that desire; it folded. Now Ive got the ability to network; one man at a time; no need to stay in the same place like when a child. I can go in different directions and not stay in freeze mode or panic mode or fight or flight or fawn mode.... I dont have to be in fear mode when making music; that uneasy feeling that someone is breathing down my back and nothing is safe...

IT may take several different types of gaps to close before I actually create music. what was bugging me about music?; isolation. I hated this lonely feeling of isolation surrounding music creation; I did not feel like a success with music; I was not connected to anyone. By believing Im going to connect with people; or knowing how; it takes the anxiety out of making music and maybe I can actually make some music.
I felt success with music was how my mother felt about my music; and about me; Now I know different; I dont have to hang out in that fear space in my head anymore; I can move on because Im not convinced Im alone anymore; I have friends... I dont need my mothers opinion of me anymore...... Im working out of it; jumping, running, leaping past her to the next section of my safe ground and then moving on through networking one man at a time; a nice solid rope of movement.... My own life.
I did not know what or why I had a problem with music; Sexual abuse plays a role; that feeling Im not safe in a space; if I take my eyes off the perimeter.
I thought my mother owned it; my space; and owned me; there fore, I was not going to create music if under her thumb or I thought it was under her thumb; However, now; knowing I am reassured through networking that I don't have to be alone or turn back to an isolated situation; I just might start creating again; and thats how it works....
So; lately; my mind has finished crossing several gaps.
Asian soulmate; this needs much more writing and work for acceptance and realization. Im getting stronger; Im fighting it bad; don't know why; don't care; Ill get their; just have to hang on....

A ledge must be climbed and overcome concerning Asian soulmate because I dont feel good enough; so; she is taller then life; to powerful Im to small; so; much work in writing about Asian soulmate until my imagination grows in this area; grows so much that Asian soulmate is not so big a deal or powerful anymore; And when this happens; something in the real world will happen and the gap will fill and a vibrational connection will occur in the outside world. first, that connection must get more powerful in the imaginary world.


Dissociative Disorder
AVPD; Social avoidance
Previous/Psychotic clinical Depression
obsessive/compulsive disorder
Evolution didn't stop my death, God did .....Now what?
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