Our partner

User avatar
OMNICELL
Consumer 6
Consumer 6
 
Posts: 1052
Joined: Tue Nov 15, 2011 5:06 am
Blog: View Blog (1751)
Archives
- March 2024
A gift from God #2
   Sat Mar 16, 2024 9:21 pm
The Gift from God…
   Tue Mar 12, 2024 5:29 pm
2 goals; elements of accomplishment
   Tue Mar 12, 2024 1:41 pm
Work Ethic is Needed Please
   Tue Mar 12, 2024 4:46 am
Some Solutions; Lot of Hope
   Thu Mar 07, 2024 5:39 am

+ February 2024
+ January 2024
+ December 2023
+ November 2023
+ October 2023
+ September 2023
+ August 2023
+ July 2023
+ June 2023
+ May 2023
+ April 2023
+ March 2023
+ February 2023
+ January 2023
+ December 2022
+ November 2022
+ October 2022
+ September 2022
+ August 2022
+ July 2022
+ June 2022
+ May 2022
+ April 2022
+ March 2022
+ February 2022
+ January 2022
+ December 2021
+ November 2021
+ October 2021
+ September 2021
+ August 2021
+ July 2021
+ June 2021
+ May 2021
+ April 2021
+ March 2021
+ February 2021
+ January 2021
+ December 2020
+ November 2020
+ October 2020
+ September 2020
+ August 2020
+ July 2020
+ June 2020
+ May 2020
+ April 2020
+ March 2020
+ February 2020
+ January 2020
+ December 2019
+ November 2019
+ October 2019
+ September 2019
+ August 2019
+ July 2019
+ June 2019
+ May 2019
+ April 2019
+ March 2019
+ February 2019
+ January 2019
+ December 2018
+ November 2018
+ October 2018
+ September 2018
+ August 2018
+ July 2018
+ June 2018
+ May 2018
+ April 2018
+ March 2018
+ February 2018
+ January 2018
+ December 2017
+ November 2017
+ October 2017
+ September 2017
+ August 2017
+ July 2017
+ June 2017
+ May 2017
+ April 2017
+ March 2017
+ February 2017
+ January 2017
+ December 2016
+ November 2016
+ September 2016
+ August 2016
+ July 2016
+ June 2016
+ May 2016
+ April 2016
+ March 2016
+ February 2016
+ January 2016
+ December 2015
+ November 2015
+ October 2015
+ September 2015
+ August 2015
+ April 2015
+ March 2015
+ February 2015
+ January 2015
+ December 2014
+ November 2014
+ October 2014
+ September 2014
+ August 2014
+ July 2014
+ June 2014
+ May 2014
+ April 2014
+ March 2014
+ February 2014
+ January 2014
+ December 2013
+ November 2013
+ October 2013
+ September 2013
+ August 2013
+ July 2013
+ June 2013
+ May 2013
+ April 2013
+ March 2013
+ February 2013
+ January 2013
+ December 2012
+ November 2012
+ October 2012
+ September 2012
+ August 2012
+ July 2012
+ June 2012
+ May 2012
+ April 2012
+ March 2012
+ February 2012
+ January 2012
+ December 2011
+ November 2011
Search Blogs

childhood neglect; and how it gets fixed!

Permanent Linkby OMNICELL on Fri Dec 23, 2016 4:26 pm

And getting closer! Im at that point that I can see my childhood!

For many people, their childhood was horrible! the problem with me; I was neglected and free! so, I spent my time in the neighbhorhood that I would call home and loved it and appreciated it! that was under the lie that I had parents! I did not; they were psychopaths! and would soon rip me out of my neighborhood and my future and my life! I was not the only one! 2 children previous to me, went through it! they were so damaged, they could not tell me what to prepare for, they could sadly watch! they could not get involved with me; they were 2 broken to be involved and watch more of this atrocity!

The atrocity occurred; now what? Im now asking God to go back in and help me reverse the whole thing! meaning, send it into another direction; a direction of productivity! That I build a base of positive achievement interest!

I remember when I was being neglected, I remember when sitting down or laying down at the TV and my parents arguing! I was acting like I was asleep, my father yelled at me and told me to go up stairs! This was a pivotal moment! as, all I had left was the TV! No one else cared about my future! my future was already being destroyed! and more n more these people showed they did not care about me or what happened to me! I did not know this was going to happen! I was not prepared for it! I was permanently thrown away!

The point is; at that point watching television that night; it was over for me; for my young life; my childhood! I was being thrown away long before it actually happened! They had been planning for it!

Ive been in a state of shock ever since! Ive been unable to move! unable to do anything, unable to function! I am now asking God to make me functional again!

The idea is to become functional based on the childhood memories that are starting to come back! I need more then 12 step support! I need God intervening and reversing the situation, taking away my fear of the outside world! Im like a 10 year old who is broken and scared! everyday, thats what I am; de-franchised from high school! from all schools! from everything! from life! I never came out of this broken childhood! I stayed the broken child and was mentally paralyzed ever since! Ive always been at the one point; no way out! and then; more abuse of the same nature of being thrown away! it was an act of a sadistic terrorist against the people who live in this land; what they did to me! it was preplanned! and it was a game for the psychopaths! I had whole life planned out! The reason? I was left alone in this neighborhood that lived next door to me! I lived their, had friends their! I had plans their! it was under the understand that my mother or father would support me as a middle class person! meaning, back me up! I assumed this to be the case! this was not the case! instead! I was thrown away, the house was sold, and I would have never seen those people again if I had not tried to see them; they went about their merry way and never came back and could care less either way! they found new families to live off of! they didnt care! I had no idea! I did not know the outcome! I had no idea who or what they were! My life was destroyed!

A destroyed life; so! what now; Im right where Im suppose to be! What now!

My memories are attacked to a time of life where someone else is paying for everything and Im around people! Im a child!

As a grown man; its interesting! I have to trust God to see how he is going to bring my life back inline! I have to trust and work with God for restoration!

Dissociative Disorder
CPTSD
AVPD; Social avoidance
Previous/Psychotic clinical Depression
agoraphobia
obsessive/compulsive disorder
Evolution didn't stop my death, God did .....Now what?
0 Comments Viewed 11844 times

Who is online

Registered users: Bing [Bot], Google [Bot], Google Feedfetcher, krk1087, Majestic-12 [Bot]