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OMNICELL
Consumer 6
Consumer 6
 
Posts: 1035
Joined: Tue Nov 15, 2011 5:06 am
Blog: View Blog (1013)
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- September 2019
One off the more nasty brutal parts of healing
   Fri Sep 13, 2019 4:52 pm
Today
   Thu Sep 12, 2019 6:22 am
More notes
   Tue Sep 03, 2019 4:33 am

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Changes occurring

Permanent Linkby OMNICELL on Sat Jan 26, 2019 1:19 am

Im getting better; stronger; my identity.
.
Im remembering who I am
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I have goals for the present and the future
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I have massive purpose; in fact; Im not sure if this is going to benefit me at 56 years old; I feel more like Im 15 or 8 or 12. I have purpose and direction; much like a kid waking up in the world. Its authentic! At 56; Im not to old to start out; Im fine; Im 56. Im not sure how to express what Im feeling.
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Feelings! Im having a hard time intellectually expressing my feelings; like my brain is damaged; Im attempting to write on blog sites; pro level blog sites; nothings coming out; Im able to put together 2 sentences; but I can 1.
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I would like to write blogs; write my feelings; they seem detached when attempting real thought out communication; something I can to think about instead of spontaneously feel. However, Ill work on it; Ive got systematic type work structures to work on; meaning; looking at blogs mathematically and not artistically. I have to look at structure first to finish a blog; not worry about the outcome of looking like a genius. Instead; simply create a complete story. Completing a complete story seems hard right now.
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Trauma causes problems.
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Im working on it.
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Im getting better; more inline with myself and my future. More work must be done for me to be present again. Im getting their. more mature
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Doesnt look like Im going to get stuck in old age hating everything like some people! Looks like Im going to be awake and modern to the best I can be; cool, present, turned on. THunder cat hustler. Old hustler. hahahahahahahah

Dissociative Disorder
CPTSD
AVPD; Social avoidance
Previous/Psychotic clinical Depression
agoraphobia
obsessive/compulsive disorder
Evolution didn't stop my death, God did .....Now what?
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