Im feeling blessed; its starting; I have to keep working on it; Im still a tortured soul. But , I am; but that doesn’t mean anything.
.
Whats important here; Im taking command of my own mind and my own life; Im getting this feeling that maybe I can leave this place; the place that I live; Im here because of disability; but I'm getting better in the sense that Im taking control of my mind. Im feeling blessed because thats what Ive been studying.
.
So; things are changing for me socially. The goal is to continue to feel blessed; if I can pull it off; I should be able to; my skills at clearing my mind are getting stronger.
.
Understand; or let the listener understand; I live in a small town; about 50 thousand; 30 in town, 20 on the outskirts. I mountain bike in the summers for various good reasons; all good. However, I deal with a lot of angry creeps out here; men and women; selfish chads that think they own the cathedral and everything in it. Lot of soy spun retards out here; or feminist control freaks. And Ill say this; I cant keep calling them negative stuff; I have to go positive on all people.
.
Anyway; outside is a bit rough dealing with the public; Anyway, Im working to feel blessed.
.
Im feeling blessed; and I have to learn to keep it up; Ive got deeper issues; deep deep issues. But they are being addressed because sun shine is coming in on them; thats the goal; like an old dusty room in a farm house; let the windows open and the light and air come in.
.
I've noticed my mind wanting to go negative all the time on things. Im finding and interesting situation; my mind goes negative; its the wrong time. meaning; a time exists for me to work on stuff. a specific time; that time is not when Im thinking about stuff; thinking about stuff negatively is not working on stuff.
For example; maybe id like to have a boat and don't have one; so; Im angry inside all the time about nothing having; feeling lack; not having the boat; and Im angry; Im an angry hurt victim. Ok; At some point; I can get pencil out and work on unraveling stories concerning getting a boat; visualizing a boat; feeling great about getting a boat; writing about it as if I all ready have a boat. and thank the universe for that boat. That is work; that is success work. When Im out on my bike; I want to concentrate on other things; I dont want to be hit with the victim mentality thinking because its useless and un productive. I understand the old victim story. However, its not successful and will not get me a new boat; However, visualizing a new boat until Im conferrable with the idea of a new boat; that will help me believe Im getting a new boat; writing about a new boat as if I all ready have it; writing about money stories as if I all ready have the money or the workings or plan for getting a boat; or pin pointing the exact kind of boat i want; and not worrying about “ how\” it will show up; let the universe do that work; all I have to do is believe and dream and visualize whats in my heart. So; Im learning; I can put all my energy on feeling blessed; then later add the things I want to my life within my imagination that I want to manifest; thats the way Im going; the way Im thinking.
.
Im in the beginning of this blessed feeling thing; Im not new to changing my thinking to success; this blessing thing is a newer part of it; all good.\.
.
Telling myself I feel great because.......
.