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OMNICELL
Consumer 6
Consumer 6
 
Posts: 1035
Joined: Tue Nov 15, 2011 5:06 am
Blog: View Blog (1009)
Archives
- August 2019
Finding my voice
   Tue Aug 20, 2019 4:47 pm
Three important conversations with women
   Tue Aug 20, 2019 1:39 am
I letting socioapths attack me again; abuse me; feel demoralized
   Mon Aug 19, 2019 11:23 am
Mellowing; and idea of exploring the entrances to the gap...
   Mon Aug 19, 2019 1:20 am
A house and a backyard and 4 walls and a hobby
   Sun Aug 18, 2019 1:09 am
moving into know mans land (positive); and then through
   Fri Aug 16, 2019 9:41 pm
The Gap
   Wed Aug 14, 2019 8:37 pm
Teenage years
   Wed Aug 14, 2019 2:25 am
finding and painting rocks
   Tue Aug 13, 2019 5:14 pm
Expressing my feelings
   Tue Aug 13, 2019 3:26 pm
I know Ive never met any women to date ever....
   Tue Aug 13, 2019 11:02 am
Being alone all of my life with out women or a relationship
   Tue Aug 13, 2019 10:16 am
The wright brothers created plaines; Im creating my new life
   Tue Aug 13, 2019 8:41 am
A new era is starting; But Ive got problems
   Mon Aug 12, 2019 12:19 pm
Signs of the end is here; and a new era starting
   Sun Aug 11, 2019 6:13 pm
Trapped between 2 worlds
   Sun Aug 11, 2019 3:23 pm
Things are getting better; Im still fat; I got a problem
   Fri Aug 09, 2019 11:38 pm
Women have defeated me? and I feel deated? #1
   Fri Aug 09, 2019 6:45 am
Plans from the universe; they have cometh
   Wed Aug 07, 2019 4:39 pm
breaking things and coming together
   Wed Aug 07, 2019 11:44 am
What am I thinking about
   Wed Aug 07, 2019 4:16 am
That breaking point
   Tue Aug 06, 2019 8:45 pm
Needing my mothers permission
   Tue Aug 06, 2019 5:47 pm
And another day
   Tue Aug 06, 2019 5:03 pm
Im so right in the middle of the promises
   Tue Aug 06, 2019 4:35 pm
whats missing with music; live playing
   Mon Aug 05, 2019 11:22 pm
Women and John Denver
   Sun Aug 04, 2019 11:33 pm
Bulling
   Sun Aug 04, 2019 1:33 am
art images coming back and other things; taking action
   Sat Aug 03, 2019 8:35 pm
I wasn't suppose to break the my first girls heart....
   Sat Aug 03, 2019 12:47 pm
Take my mother out of the picture; what do I get.
   Fri Aug 02, 2019 11:47 pm
Where am at right now.
   Thu Aug 01, 2019 11:30 am

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Being friends with women; making out with women

Permanent Linkby OMNICELL on Mon Aug 20, 2018 5:05 pm

Being friends with women; making out with women; this means moving on from the past; that baby; is what it means! Im working with the universe for this; this is my top manifestation; what does this mean; it means I move on from the past into the arms of new women for friendships; relationships and making out!
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Dissociative disorder; destroying my friendship life and love make out life!
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Dissociative disorder blanks me out anytime I want to get close to someone; it flashes pictures of the psychopaths when I was young; knocking me out! I completely dislocate from reality and Im turned into a sleep walker; the equivalent! Im not actually sleeping; I mean, my nervous system turns away from whats in front of me and dissociates into the other direction! I can never get close to anyone; my dissociative disorder wont let me! What if I just want to make out with women; no go!
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Ive found that no women gets in; non of them! I can ask for 1000 phone numbers; and I never call them or go out with anyone or deal with them! I tell myself; Im just a player and Ill end up using the girl! or; I really like her and Im afraid of getting into a long term relationship with her! At the end of the day; nothing! No girl is close enough to be my friend! and Im not making out with anyone! and yet; theirs plenty of women to go out with! So; this is a big big big big big problem; becoming my number one concern; I want it fixed; Im sick of this! its horrible!
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I have watch porn because of this! because of my dissociative disorder; I dont have a choice because the PTSD is triggered so badly that I cant get close to anyone; My nervous system will not listen to the reality in front of me; it dissociates to the past and I relive things; or my nervous system will not allow me to relive things; it completely shuts everything down!
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Im really freaked and bugged that I dont have women as friends; I mean; friends! the ability to have a women as a friend! Nothing! Im working with the universe to change this! its horrible because no one can ever be my soulmate and no relationships just protection; and I dont want protection anymore; but it wont go away and it wont go down; its like a solid rock I cant blast through! we will see!
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So; Im pushing on the universe to open things up! its time I get a new life and some new friends in my life; some new women in my life; and not being controlled by the old thoughts or memories of the past! its time for change!

Dissociative Disorder
CPTSD
AVPD; Social avoidance
Previous/Psychotic clinical Depression
agoraphobia
obsessive/compulsive disorder
Evolution didn't stop my death, God did .....Now what?
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