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OMNICELL
Consumer 6
Consumer 6
 
Posts: 1036
Joined: Tue Nov 15, 2011 5:06 am
Blog: View Blog (1107)
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- November 2020
The work is over my head; but thats OK
   Wed Nov 18, 2020 8:35 am
Wont let the people I love into my life...
   Tue Nov 17, 2020 5:45 am
Social and feeling worthy
   Mon Nov 16, 2020 4:21 pm
Loving myself for real
   Fri Nov 13, 2020 5:15 pm
Moving onward
   Fri Nov 13, 2020 1:29 pm
And her vision keeps getting closer
   Wed Nov 11, 2020 11:19 am
On moving on and creating a new life
   Sun Nov 08, 2020 9:53 pm
Breaking the dating barrier
   Sat Nov 07, 2020 6:22 pm
Back to the drawing board with women
   Thu Nov 05, 2020 2:53 am
Changes are occurring; still isolated and lonely
   Tue Nov 03, 2020 6:13 am

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AVPD being faced

Permanent Linkby OMNICELL on Sun May 26, 2019 3:10 pm

Walking home this morning; A women pops out from a doorbell; stunned me; an attractive young women; I looked at her; freaked me out; Im in freeze shock; but I just look at her; she could dismiss me and this scares me to death; then I hear the voice of a gentleman, She's with a guy; I cant see him; somehow this is reassuring to me; she will put the focus on him and she will fee safe; she looks away from me and at him as I walk by; Im happy; but she didn't look away fast enough; we had eye contact for a minute. And it was scary; ice sickles running down my spine, stomach and nervous system; but I did ok; she said hi; I rigidly said hi; and I did not turn away, I held my ground and felt my feelings and moxied along; I held the path; Hurray; Victory is so sweet swhahahahahahahhahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhaahahahhha
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Then a saw another women with a dog in front of me in the yard to the church; I was startled and nervous, As I approached; I did not avoid; She said hello; and I said hello; “ Nice Dog” She was beaming that I noticed her and her big cool dog; and it was; but she was happy and beaming and I continued to walk; she thanked me and I was ouda- their.
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Heres the point; facing this stuff is a form of reality independence outside in the real world away from agoraphobia.
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This is the best I've ever done; it means Im becoming friends with the environment around me; and that is truly a bloody miracle; However, Ive been working on this for years; indirectly and directly; thousands of hours of work; so Im earning it; but when it comes to mental illness; you don't know when or how things are going to work out; but everything is working out.

Dissociative Disorder
CPTSD
AVPD; Social avoidance
Previous/Psychotic clinical Depression
agoraphobia
obsessive/compulsive disorder
Evolution didn't stop my death, God did .....Now what?
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