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OMNICELL
Consumer 6
Consumer 6
 
Posts: 1035
Joined: Tue Nov 15, 2011 5:06 am
Blog: View Blog (918)
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- June 2019
Lonely and still here
   Tue Jun 25, 2019 11:32 am
going to meetings; Yuk
   Tue Jun 25, 2019 3:55 am
social is coming back; but its slow and about thinking
   Tue Jun 25, 2019 2:00 am
intimacy 3
   Mon Jun 24, 2019 11:26 am
1966 and 50 years later; or 50 years to late?
   Mon Jun 24, 2019 4:29 am
Coping with what has happened to me in this life
   Mon Jun 24, 2019 1:43 am
Visualizations
   Sat Jun 22, 2019 9:27 pm
Talents and development
   Sat Jun 22, 2019 12:39 pm
Money and women
   Sat Jun 22, 2019 12:19 pm
women and shame
   Fri Jun 21, 2019 5:53 am
Music creating; blocked
   Fri Jun 21, 2019 1:46 am
Im getting very close
   Fri Jun 21, 2019 1:25 am
Its hard when you were never loved.
   Thu Jun 20, 2019 5:29 pm
Things are changing
   Thu Jun 20, 2019 6:08 am
Cant finish anything I start; cant get started
   Thu Jun 20, 2019 3:36 am
Social isolation; social uphill climb
   Thu Jun 20, 2019 2:25 am
Feeling better inside
   Wed Jun 19, 2019 11:28 pm
Money
   Wed Jun 19, 2019 11:38 am
An interest in the arts
   Tue Jun 18, 2019 9:39 am
Social
   Mon Jun 17, 2019 10:32 pm
intimacy 2
   Mon Jun 17, 2019 4:02 pm
intimacy
   Mon Jun 17, 2019 10:51 am
Identity overwhelmed
   Sun Jun 16, 2019 10:22 am
re changing the present
   Wed Jun 12, 2019 3:45 pm
Working out of it; the struggle continues
   Tue Jun 11, 2019 4:14 pm
A new segment of life
   Tue Jun 11, 2019 1:07 am
dealing with life from zero to 18
   Mon Jun 10, 2019 8:13 pm
Connecting to things in the real world
   Mon Jun 10, 2019 11:53 am
Things are changing
   Mon Jun 10, 2019 4:43 am
I have to believe more
   Sat Jun 08, 2019 10:24 pm
liking myself and dating
   Thu Jun 06, 2019 8:46 pm
Dissociation
   Thu Jun 06, 2019 4:58 pm
Love
   Tue Jun 04, 2019 11:05 pm
Purpose
   Tue Jun 04, 2019 7:27 pm
Happiness
   Tue Jun 04, 2019 11:04 am
bulling and meditation and connection and...
   Sun Jun 02, 2019 8:03 pm
Bulling and meditation and connection and...
   Sun Jun 02, 2019 5:57 am
Childhood reconnection;
   Sat Jun 01, 2019 4:26 pm

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August 1st 2015; something new!

Permanent Linkby OMNICELL on Sat Aug 01, 2015 10:56 pm

Been awhile since Ive been here! Ive dumped everything on FB; 10 blogs a day! Those people know more about me then my therapist! I don't care either!

So, Im 10 years old, and I do not know there is a problem! I have my plans and my future and my secure life! Then the women whom owns this house sells it and leaves! Comes in one day and tells me she's selling the house! Cold and satanic like! No remorse! My father has left earlier! He's never coming back! I have no one to talk care of me! And she is a sadistic psychopath!

What was I thinking or feeling before this! What plans did I have for the future! What was I looking forward to! These are the questions I have to get in touch with! I must get in touch with those feelings and memories once again! The goal is to kick start my life again from that point just before the disaster struck!

What was I planning on! What did I think I was going to get help with! What were my goals!

Im interested in being that person again! Mending the break is not the issue! Reconnection and becoming that person again; with the knowledge that Im not in my original home and never will be again; thats the issue!

The biggest problem has been; I cant go home! That has to change! Somehow God has to help me believe Im home! Its very hard and sickening to deal with! Im not sure how he's going to pull it off! I have to keep praying to him!

This venture has to do with age 10; being broken at age 10; losing my home at age 10; losing my mother n father at age 10! Losing my schooling at age 10! Losing the neighborhood at age 10; losing my dreams at age 10! Losing my best friend at Age 10! Losing my city at age 10.

Dissociative Disorder
CPTSD
AVPD; Social avoidance
Previous/Psychotic clinical Depression
agoraphobia
obsessive/compulsive disorder
Evolution didn't stop my death, God did .....Now what?
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