Our partner

User avatar
Consumer 6
Consumer 6
Posts: 1036
Joined: Tue Nov 15, 2011 5:06 am
Blog: View Blog (1248)
- August 2021
+ July 2021
+ June 2021
+ May 2021
+ April 2021
+ March 2021
+ February 2021
+ January 2021
+ December 2020
+ November 2020
+ October 2020
+ September 2020
+ August 2020
+ July 2020
+ June 2020
+ May 2020
+ April 2020
+ March 2020
+ February 2020
+ January 2020
+ December 2019
+ November 2019
+ October 2019
+ September 2019
+ August 2019
+ July 2019
+ June 2019
+ May 2019
+ April 2019
+ March 2019
+ February 2019
+ January 2019
+ December 2018
+ November 2018
+ October 2018
+ September 2018
+ August 2018
+ July 2018
+ June 2018
+ May 2018
+ April 2018
+ March 2018
+ February 2018
+ January 2018
+ December 2017
+ November 2017
+ October 2017
+ September 2017
+ August 2017
+ July 2017
+ June 2017
+ May 2017
+ April 2017
+ March 2017
+ February 2017
+ January 2017
+ December 2016
+ November 2016
+ September 2016
+ August 2016
+ July 2016
+ June 2016
+ May 2016
+ April 2016
+ March 2016
+ February 2016
+ January 2016
+ December 2015
+ November 2015
+ October 2015
+ September 2015
+ August 2015
+ April 2015
+ March 2015
+ February 2015
+ January 2015
+ December 2014
+ November 2014
+ October 2014
+ September 2014
+ August 2014
+ July 2014
+ June 2014
+ May 2014
+ April 2014
+ March 2014
+ February 2014
+ January 2014
+ December 2013
+ November 2013
+ October 2013
+ September 2013
+ August 2013
+ July 2013
+ June 2013
+ May 2013
+ April 2013
+ March 2013
+ February 2013
+ January 2013
+ December 2012
+ November 2012
+ October 2012
+ September 2012
+ August 2012
+ July 2012
+ June 2012
+ May 2012
+ April 2012
+ March 2012
+ February 2012
+ January 2012
+ December 2011
+ November 2011
Search Blogs


Permanent Linkby OMNICELL on Mon Jun 18, 2012 3:13 pm

"Its all a game; memories. Im Afraid many people have come from a community and family system like mine... Many people at the state Pen are from from over exposer to dysfunctional systems.
My mother was a sociopath that sadistically hated men and children... My father was a sociopath that abandoned anything. What a bizarre combination. I had no relationship with my mother and a false relationship with my father. . She was a stranger/he was a stranger. As a child I had a fantasy bond associated with that time. Im afraid everything I believed and set my heart on was false. The family system I came from were a family of deviant sadistic creepers.. People of a humanistic watered down description. I was destroyed then erased as a human being.. These were sick people, much like the offenders at the state penitentiary. And the surrounding upper middle class white communities were the same; Sadistic murders soul murderers. if you ever gave them a chance to find innocence alone under the dark with no protection." : run!!


Im anchored, slowly being maneuvered by 7 tugboats to bring me out of the harbor back down the river of life. Im at the harbor of the ocean. I will probably go back and fourth down that ocean coast of memories a few more times. Its not over. Plenty of dissociations that have over-boarded are still uncovered and worked on. It is not a mountain anymore that I climb; or I shall say, the mountain has plenty of open paths at this time. The paths are smooth and open and solid, much travel is going up those paths, back and fourth, much traffic geographic.. Because of happiness and openness the valley is crying for seekers. Much energy flows back n fourth. Enthusiasm and hopeful energy fill the landsrad.

My mother is the worst of the nightmares, what she did. She was a psychological coward and a bully. like the bully you find in junior high, Only its a psychological game to her. And it is a game; destroying children's lives that she be entertained, that she prove her status and loyalty to her rich friends and not her family. The despicable quality to a sociopath is beyond my scope of question. They will wreck other people if there Ego's are being trampled on. Trampled on by decency and the truth. The truth is good enough.

My only crime; I was born to the wrong race of people. This whole white way of life is so sicking.. its like drinking strychnine and over amounts of sand based vanilla extract. The choking sensation can be defined like the choking sensation one encounters in the torture device of water boarding. "My O my"..!!!! God get me out of here....!! Give me relief...

Cowards attack where they believe there underhanded behavior can get away with it. They feel nothing. Cowards feel contempt for there victims and always will. Most of the victims are decent honorable members of the citizenry. These gutless,deserters look for the weak, they look for the unattended and the shy. These brood of vipers are criminals and they are not interested in changing... They are lovers of Evil; to lie and deceive is a way of life to these vampires. They worship the father of lies from below. The oppressor and the oppressed have one thing in common; God sees both.... No one gets to hide.

When a person like myself has been humiliated, all I can do is move forward, talk to others about the pain, get it out, keep going on. I cant deal with it alone, there must be a group of loving people to help.

The reasons I had problems with my mother and father, or that my mother and father went to war with me; they were not my parent, or real parents. I came through them at birth; not from them. I came from God; God is my real parent. I never had a mom or dad. These people were sociopaths who had found themselves in a family system. They had no ties to anyone. They had exterior ambitions for self gratification, nothing more. In other words. They were ######6 worthless trash creeps that some how found themselves in the opportunity of free people, in this case; children, to destroy them! Poor people of all modern societies, God be with them....

These Creeps care nothing about their own citizens, They hate children and will kill them. They have no respect. No respect for anything. A very watered down bad version of the human race.

Who are what ever this people were, they had no business disrupting my life. My life is and was, none of there business. And these peoples personal lives had no business crossing into my personal boundaries. This is a case of a simple based sociopaths, nothing more. Nothing new here. These types of Creepo's frequent the local district attorneys jails all day long. And the whole of this family system was in this condition. I lost everything: My way of life, my friends, my future, those that I loved, my childhood; any if all personal development was halted and destroyed. Everything was Genocide... I was no more... All hopes and dreams lost as my brain and my mind was twisted and turned inside out. And I will say; the community also turned on me and swept me under the rug as if I had never existed.

Its unfortunate that Evil is part of the landscape. I hate a society that does not protect its children from death by way of Evil intent of others, specifically and more horrifically, " Their own citizens killing their innocent for sport, for trophy seeking, to look good to the country club" And to destroy the innocent children from their own families,. To drive them to the rope, or the shotgun, to create a scenario of self inflicted unrest.These people aught to be killed for such acts of treason, tak'n to the town square and beat'n to death; hacked up with no reprisal.

I was a victim of this American created wrath. I lived and survived much like those fighting in the trenches of World War 1. I had little hope of survival. It was more Psychological and emotional at first,; later it would be physical, sexual terror. Geographical and abandonment issue also played a large roll. And many more things that I will not explain at the moment.

Im attempting to come to grips with the realities associated with this family system, and the adjoining village people of my area. Most of an upper middle class resume; I was a fair weather recipient. I never knew. I thought I had life long friends and girl friends. I that I had a best friend that was closer then a brother. Not so!, As soon as pummeled to mental instability, everyone disappeared without a trace never to be seen again. It was all about social status... I never knew.. all of those relationships that meant so much to me: worthless!. I feel so hopeless and degenerate. How could I have ever given an eye to any of these people. Vermin!!

The goal is to work back to being the decent person I am with the values that I have; see my past for what it really was; let go of all people from the past and move away and never come back... Its possible; this life has been unreal, unbelievable. I hope no one else ever has to go through this nightmare. I almost didn't make it... Its not over yet. I have turbulent trauma rehash to go through...

Many years left to work through....

Specific time periods of 8 to 14. These are developmental years; these are prime target years for the the attack of a sadistic sociopath.

This is the age of the unprotected weak...

Welcome to modern Society!!

Dissociative Disorder
AVPD; Social avoidance
Previous/Psychotic clinical Depression
obsessive/compulsive disorder
Evolution didn't stop my death, God did .....Now what?
0 Comments Viewed 26454 times

Who is online

Registered users: Artninja1995, Bing [Bot], Google [Bot], Google Adsense [Bot], Google Feedfetcher, HermanCit, JulianDat, Kaleb28, LorenzaL, turenne