Lately I've been going to sleep when the sun comes up and waking up when the sun comes down. It is not insomnia. Last night (or maybe this morning) I was in a heated debate with my cousin who just didn't understand what I was trying to say. Then a "friend" of mine (we will call her Dhi) commented a long ass response. I simply responded saying "I do not feel like arguing about this anymore." Dhi went BALLISTIC. Dhi started posting vaguebook/passive-aggressive status updates on their blog and I called them out on it. They then proceeded to rip me a new one. I unfriended them and messaged them to tell them good bye. They then screen capped my private message and posted it on my wall (all the while claiming it was on *their* wall
) and wrote really nasty things about me. Calling me self-centered, selfish, unempathetic, etc. They claimed that I treated them like an unpaid therapist.I don't even know what that means. Treating someone like a therapist? When I sit down to talk to my therapist I don't really talk. Most if not all the things I talked about with Dhi were Special Interests of mine. So like one time I babbled one about the differences between the DSM-III, DSM-IV, and DSM-5.
Another bad sign has been happening too.
My homicidal urges and plannings are coming back. I'm starting to lose emotional feelings again and I wonder if I could feel again if I stabbed somebody *mod edit*.
I know I wouldn't ever do it. But who wants to bet I am hospitalized this year at some point?