So I've done pretty well keeping up with homework for my classes this week. Only thing I can't seem to get off ma butt and do is write this small paper. I'm just not really interested in the topic, so even cleaning my bathroom is more entertaining to me than this paper. It's due Sunday night, so I'll eventually put time into it (thank god I have the gift of gab and am good at writing when not mentally blocked, so whipping out last-minute assignments never kills me). We're supposed to do something "odd" for 1 minute in public and see how others react (it's for a class in social deviance). My paper is about walking my dogs while walking backwards. Thrilling. Not. Anyhow, that's today's activity that I'm avoiding with just about anything else I can find to do.
What else?
Well, it seems that I've not talked to random people in a while, so last night when I was asleep and drooling on the couch my phone was inundated with emails, calls and texts from several people with "What's up?" messages. I have about 5 or so people who I'd call my "inner circle" that I talk to regularly. Then there's the "fringe crowd" that I only keep up with when I can remember. These are people that I'm not close with, but I guess I'd consider them decent aquaintances who live across the country. I hate to sound like a cold heartless person, but the "fringe" people are ones that seem to think our friendship is deeper than it really is. I don't let people too far in because (as was the case with the friend downstairs who is "done with me") I've just been hurt too much by people (usually women) deleting me from their lives (for various reasons, not really illness related). Usually it takes me a while to let a person far into my world. Just feels safer to keep people at bay. Anyhow, it's usually the fringe people that end up getting pissed off at me for not periodically updating them. So I guess this evening I will spend time catching them up. I don't know why I just can't be totally honest with people about how deep our friendship really is (or is not), but the "don't want to hurt people" part of me just keeps me acquiescing people. I get aggitated about this at times. grrrrrr. I'm not anti-social, per se. Guess I'm just guarded and private and having a handful of close friends is ok with me... I'm not into racking up a long list of people in my life. Blah blah blah... dunno where I'm going with this topic... just blabbering. Maybe my point is that keeping the fringe people updated makes me mentally tired.
Uh oh. Writer's block. Can't think of really anything else to complain about for now
Ok, will end the entry here.
Maybe some eggs will make me smile...
Hugs to you all....
Koshka
. If you can't get motivated, maybe do your paper on some kind of paraphilia. (But I really DON'T need to hear the details of THAT okay!) haha.