I remember the time when i had something i needed to finish..
Some test, some cleaning or some holiday i was looking forward to.
Most of it was duties but ever now and again i would encounter something important, a new challenge or something new.
Like new shoes that needed to be walked in, or a new book with fresh pages..
Today i am still wearing new shoes, still buying new books but something is gone.
Like the first few leaves that fall of the autumn tree.
I too have lost some of my time and i can only look back at the memories.
For people who are not able to work life feels like a retirement. A retirement is a reminder of death.
A lot of "dead" time passes a head of me.
Sometimes it discourages me and other times it doesn`t.
But i miss expectations. Without people in my life who care for me i don`t have that same expectation of me nor my life, where i am going or time.
I am sorta lost in time. In all its emptiness, expectations and fullness.
Watching time slip away
The view is more important then anything or anybody.
(Not writing this because i am afraid of death..or dying..writing this because i am alive despite all those dead leaves that has fallen down beneath me, and despite all the branches that has broken off, i am still a tree-(or me
).