Frustrating day, nothing quite going right, and nothing wrong enough to give me an excuse to feel this way. Minimal daydreaming, at least I kept that up.

This evening, I'm not even interested in browsing around the Schizoid forum. Despite informed debates over whether it even is a Personality Disorder, whether people with it have a Problem, or whether it impairs "normal" functioning, it is apparently still worth defending as a status label by people wearing that label. Those of us who do not have a diagnosis are impure and probably wrong about ourselves.

That would be fine, I don't have to play in that den, but I thought I'd found somewhere I wouldn't feel like a weirdo, and I don't like being wrong. And still weird. Of course, "feeling unwelcome" and "wanting somewhere" and being self-aware enough to feel "weird" are all non pure-Schizoid attitudes, further proving the "doesn't count without a diagnosis" in my case. I did find another forum online catering to loners, but it focused on supporting people who were unhappy with that status. LOL. I want admittedly bizarrely contradictory contact with people who seem to think, like me, that people are lovely, but better off at armslength. Where the length includes a wall or two.

Insight strikes. To be accurate, what I want contact with is people's minds. I don't like the bodies. Not in a meat phobia way, just it takes ages to get anywhere going through neurons to tongue and lips and air and ears and back to neurons. Interesting. Am I making another argument for reading more? It is after all the old school form of distilling thought. I should get offline.