(TW ALTERS, EATING DISORDER)

-Lucy, original?, 17?-

Well I've been thinking a lot over the things I've learned about my other parts. I'm still hesitant, since this is all new to me. My greatest fear is that I'm making this up for excitement or attention or something. I don't do it intentionally, this is something that just happens. I'm also worried maybe I'm forcing it. Can alters even be triggered by, like, thinking about them? Or calling to them? I would think so but I have no idea. I'll have to learn more about them and myself.

Right now everything in my inner world is strained and blurry. I think it has to do with my eating disorder. Since I began restricting, it's like everything is different. Honestly I denied their help and advice when they tried to get me to take care of this body. I don't think they're mad but it's put, like I mentioned, a strain on things.

Last night I was talking to myself about negative things that have happened, and I got a voice telling me to stop, yelling at me. Then another voice was yelling and saying "Violetta!" over and over. So I believe I met Violetta. She is not coming out now, nor has she before, but I believe she's in an upset kind of pain. I hope she'll be at least somewhat alright, I'll just have to be more careful.

I'm also guessing whoever was yelling her name, since it began as calling out to repeating like an alarm, almost. Maybe her caregiver? An overseer? She was very young, a child, must be younger than 10. I faintly saw her I believe; dark brown bobbed hair and a dress, I think. I can't really be 100% sure.

I thought it would be a good idea to write down things that occur like this, and other things to do with my mental health, and this seems to be a good safe place to do it. Also easy to edit and re-write things if necessary.

Until next time!

Hey there-

I used to blog a lot, and have long appreciated this part of the forums. Just so we're clear, once published, they can't be re-edited. Forum posts do have a short window wherein they can be edited or deleted, but blog posts, once published, can't.

I wasn't sure if that was understood from your last paragraph.

Also, although you will eventually leave new member moderator preview in the forums (meaning your posts won't have to be approved every time), in the blogs it's different- all blog posts and replies, are always moderated before published. So it might be a small delay before you see it appear. I'm usually the one to approve blog posts, but not always.

Appreciate the *TW* although I think it's fairly tame- as far as the eating disorder goes... mostly we stay away from numbers- lbs lost/gained that kind of thing. In the same vein as in cutting and self injury (self injury brought me to PF) we don't speak of number/depth of cuts in that forum, we also avoid numbers and graphic severity in ED.

But anyway welcome to you and the rest of your system!

[quote="Snaga"]Hey there-

I used to blog a lot, and have long appreciated this part of the forums. Just so we're clear, once published, they can't be re-edited. Forum posts do have a short window wherein they can be edited or deleted, but blog posts, once published, can't.

I wasn't sure if that was understood from your last paragraph.

Also, although you will eventually leave new member moderator preview in the forums (meaning your posts won't have to be approved every time), in the blogs it's different- all blog posts and replies, are always moderated before published. So it might be a small delay before you see it appear. I'm usually the one to approve blog posts, but not always.

Appreciate the *TW* although I think it's fairly tame- as far as the eating disorder goes... mostly we stay away from numbers- lbs lost/gained that kind of thing. In the same vein as in cutting and self injury (self injury brought me to PF) we don't speak of number/depth of cuts in that forum, we also avoid numbers and graphic severity in ED.

But anyway welcome to you and the rest of your system![/quote]

Thank you for letting me know <3