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seabreezeblue
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some half formed thoughts..
   Thu Mar 22, 2018 7:16 pm

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aspie musings..

Permanent Linkby seabreezeblue on Sun May 25, 2014 9:44 am

Potential trigger warnings in blog.. leave now or forever wish you had :P

Well, what can i say..

I've made a new real life friend, or rather i'm in the process of making a new friend because while collecting friendships is often an easy thing for an NT to do (not all NTs obv).. it's really a bit different for the average aspie..

I really like this woman and she actually listens.. do you know how rare it is that anyone listens to anyone else..?

I'm fascinated by social interactions.. (mostly because i've had to write my own manual over the years and i'm determined one day to go a whole day without being clumsy and wanting to beat myself round the head later with poisonous cacti for a silly, well meaning but mis-timed comment)

I'll give an example of what i mean when i say that no-one ever listens.. this conversation happened between me and my sister a week or so ago; (me) ''i'm going for an MRi scan next month because the doctor is worried i may have MS''.. sister briefly looks at me and states ''you can't have MS'' and then starts talking about how she feels tired..
I'm standing there looking at her and wondering why people do this.. it's not a deliberate thing by any means.. it's as though the brain has a filter and all conversations get strained through a sieve on the way in.. the person then processes only the bit that makes sense to them and discards the rest..

anyway.. there is relevance in my little ramble here; Perception is key.

My new friend and i were walking back home from the school together and we walked past a very clearly autistic child and his mother.. my friend pipes up ''they're easy to spot you know''.. puzzled i replied ''who are?''
''Aspies'' she replied.. ''my older son is an aspie and it's so easy to spot them when you've had your own''..

Okey dokey i thought and said ''i've heard that many aspies learn to blend in and not be noticed''


''Oh No.. i can always spot them, there's a dad in the playground with aspergers as well.. that guy you talk to''

Uh huh.. now do i tell her that the reason i talk to that dad in the playground is because we met briefly at an aspie social meet..?



See; aspies aren't all eye contact dodging hand flappers, although to be quite honest that hand flapping thing looks kind of comforting.. i might just quit restraining all my natural comfort seeking behaviour and stand in the playground shaking my leg, blinking repeatedly and stop trying to blend in..

Oh.. the eye contact thing.. I can do eye contact - it feels really uncomfortable but i can do it.. I grew up in a time where lack of eye contact wasn't recognised as okay and fine for the person.. I grew up in a time where every grown-up would lean so close to my face that i could feel the spit coming from their mouths and would shout ''look at me when i'm talking to you''

I'm sure many NTs can relate to that last bit though..

Shine me a light up
and i'll run round the moon..



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Re: aspie musings..

Permanent Linkby dnanwodedispU on Mon Nov 20, 2017 4:49 pm

I would like to listen. :)
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